Sunday, December 12, 2010

Wanted: One Week With No Consequences

As the girls and I were out on the town last night (read: driving aimlessly with little to do) we decided to hit up the Cheesecake Factory for a little snack.

I love the Cheesecake Factory and neither Matti or Amy had been there. To which I say: WHAT!? How is that possible? They have the most delicious foodstuffs. And then, of course, there is the cheesecake. Which is pretty dang delicious. I discovered my new favorite thing: Vietnamese tacos. Vietnamese TACOS! Can you imagine anything more appetizing? At this moment, I can't. I wish I had them right now. The fact that they only cost $5.95 or something, makes them even MORE delicious. Sigh. I wonder how I could make my own...

As we were sitting at the bar, virgin beverages in hand, we were discussing the fact that we might, sometimes, be curious enough to wonder what would happen if the bartender had accidentally forgot to make our drinks sans the alcohol. We decided that we wished there was a chance to go a day - which quickly got changed to a week - of being able to try, experiment, DO anything and everything that we've ever wanted or thought we wanted to do. Just one week to see what it was all like.

Of course, then I noted that we would probably have to have that week blotted out in our memories. Because even if we were partaking in some of the more disgusting things (smoking or something like such as) we were bound to stumble upon something that would be harder to give up... (not smoking...).

So we wanted one week to drink, get tattoos and piercings and sex it up with absolutely no consequences. No guilt. No diseases. No fire and brimstone. No condescension. And then we would forget about it all enough to be able to give it all up, but remember enough to have satisfied our curiosities.

As I was writing about all of these grand ideas in my journal, I realized something that shouldn't have been as poignant and philosophical as it was. But it was this:

I shouldn't be wanting to do any of these things.

Heavenly Father gave us guidelines - commandments - for a reason. He gave us Jesus Christ to emulate and to help us have a goal in what we are striving to become. Asking for a week to do things that are directly opposite His plan for us, is absolutely retarded, considering, it would take us directly opposite of where we are meant to be.

I spent years in high school trying to prove to people that the Church doesn't inhibit or make me do - or not do - anything. It's my choice. It's my agency. I don't abstain from drugs and alcohol and tattoos because I am made to do it. And I'm not being driven by obligation or guilt. I choose to stay away from those things because I know that ultimately it is the right choice for me to make. Does it quench my curiosity? No. Not really. But at the same time, I know that if the Lord thought I was missing out on something spectacular, He would probably let me do it.

There was a time in my life when none of the vices were even the slightest temptation. I'm surprised that as I've gotten older, it has become more enticing. Still, I know I won't cave because in the end, I DO know that it is my choice, and I will choose to do those things which the Lord has asked me to do - or not do - as best as I can. I know that the commandments and counsels of God are given to us to really protect us from ourselves.

And you can't, on any level, escape consequences. No matter how much you entertain the idea.

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