Wicked

Once upon a time, I was a HORRIBLE daughter and didn't get my mom anything for Christmas. Turns out, most of my siblings did the same thing and in the end I was racked with guilt about not showing my mom how awesome she is and how much she deserves pretty much anything her giant heart desires; we didn't shower her with gifts like she should be...

Six months later, Mother's Day was coming up and my mom mentioned that Wicked was coming to Dayton and that she wanted to see it. I looked up the schedule, and saw that the show was also coming to Salt Lake City, and asked if she planned on being in town.

She was. So I bought tickets! Happy Christmas and Merry Mother's Day!

So my mom flew in to town to visit me...and mostly her parents...and we made a night of it. (Sorry, Amy, wish you could have been there, too.) Mom and I went to La Jolla Groves, which is a favorite of mine... or I should say, has the best salmon dish (and lemon cake) ever. And then we headed up to the Capitol Theatre and enjoyed the show.

I had anticipated not liking Wicked very much. I don't know why. It was a totally silly thought. I think it had something to do with the fact that it was SO hyped up when it first came out (duh, it really is that good) and I knew that it couldn't be a lot like the book that it is based off of, and they had done a reality show of sorts for it on MTV, and all of that just made me really nervous.

Aside from quite literally melting in the Capitol Theatre, we enjoyed the show a lot. A lot. A lot. The two female leads were spectacular; and as much as I am a fan of Kristin Chenoweth and Idina Menzel, I think that I'm an even bigger fan of Alli Mauzey and Nicole Parker.

Alli was absolutely, incredibly brilliant at playing Glinda ("the 'ga' is silent). I've pulled up the videos on youtube.com, and they are all of Kristen, and really, I just loved Alli so much more. Sigh. Anyway, FANTASTIC.

It was really fun to spend the evening with my mom, doing something that she enjoys doing (and doesn't get to do often) and I admit, I'm totally on the Wicked bandwagon now. Although, I don't think you'll ever catch me with the soundtrack on my iPod.

Happy Birthday, America!

I spent the majority of the Fourth in bed. I woke up and was ready for the day by 7:30 a.m., headed to the Kiwanis Pancake breakfast with Megan and Eddie, and then went home and basically went back to sleep until much, much later.

After my marathon nap, I went over to the Nunez's house, and enjoyed some delicious food, company, and all-around happiness while we waited for the Stadium of Fire to start. We could hear the whole program, and so we jammed to the Beach Boys, got soaked by the untimely sprinklers, and enjoyed the terrific firework display.

Tonight, I ended Freedom week with a little visit with my dear friend, Colin. He hasn't made an appearance on this blog for a while, so I'm happy to post a few pictures:

We went up to City Creek in Salt Lake. He treated me to some Kneader's for dinner and then we walked over to Temple Square where we discovered that the Utah National Guard Orchestra was doing a Patriot Concert, and we decided at the last minute to go.

I'm so glad that we did.

The program was really great, with songs composed from different wartimes, soldiers, along with classics from the "American songbook", movie scores, and a medley of all the songs from the Armed Forces. It was really cool to sing the national anthem in the Tabernacle, and to add our gratitude to the men and women who have served.

I think it was the perfect way to finish the week.

I really do love this guy.

I Loved this Weekend

This weekend was great. It was the perfect mixture of good weather, good company, stuff to do and getting things done. Saturday I woke up at 10 a.m., made breakfast and basked in the fact that I had cleaned my room on Thursday, so there wasn't anything for me to do. I pulled out a book, read a bit and then Melissa texted me and told me to come walking with her.

So we went for a lovely stroll around Carterville park and enjoyed the perfect fall weather with Megan and James. I ran small bits of it, making me feel like I was doing some good exercise and enjoying the day. Even though I was told by a trainer at Gold's Gym that I shouldn't be running, I decided a little bit wouldn't hurt me. When did I start enjoy running? Never. I hate it. A lot. But there is something about running that makes you feel like you've actually done something productive and now that I've been told that I'm "not allowed", it has made me want to all the more. Plus, running in the fall is the best time to do it.

Melissa and I came home and read dumb magazines until it was time to get spruced up for our play. My friend Meghan had bought tickets to see My Fair Lady at the Hale Center Theatre, but couldn't use them and didn't want them to go to waste. So she passed them on to me, and I invited Melissa to see it with me. I thought initially that we were going to see Mary Poppins, but this was MUCH better!

We decided to stop and get something to eat before the show. Originally, I was going to go to Cheesecake Factory, but that's on the other side of Salt Lake, so we opted to go to La Hacienda, a favorite Mexican place of mine, but! we were worried about time, so we opted for a place called the Saigoon Noodle House. I didn't know what to order and ended up with Vietnamese crepes, which were more like flaky omelets with weird meat and shrimp and bean sprouts. I think I was supposed to eat part of it wrapped in the lettuce leaves, but I'm not entirely sure. So I dipped the meat and the shrimp in the spicy red chili sauce and enjoyed it. Melissa was pretty sure that the server was laughing at me, but that's fine.

We made it to the Hale Center Theatre, only two blocks away, after sitting in a line of cars for half an hour. Which was fine; we still had plenty of time, and even had to wait before they opened the auditorium for us. We had great seats, though, I think nearly every seat in the place would be good. It was a circular theater, which I have never been to before, which made it all the more exciting.

I love My Fair Lady. Of course, I have seen the movie with Audrey Hepburn. I loved it ever since I watched it in elementary school for music class, or when we watched it in Latin. I love the story of it, and that it's based on the mythological story Pygmalion (so is Pretty Woman). The play is better, even though it was done almost exactly like the movie. The music was so great, and the only thing that would have made it better was to have Becca sitting next to me -- seeing as how we often sing and dance to two of the main songs from this play, it would seem fitting to have her there as well.

The actors all did a great job in their respective characters. The only thing that I would complain about is that Henry Higgins, supposed master of the English language used the word "hung" instead of "hanged" where he was supposed to. I don't know if that was the actor's folly or the script. And Mrs. Higgins, Henry's mother, was a little.... less English aristocratic than I would envision. I didn't like the way the actress played her at all. However, Alfie Doolittle's character was brilliantly done. Normally I do not like his side story at all, but the man who played Doolittle was great.

There was also technical difficulties after the ball and they had to raise the lights and no one really knew what was going on. But that was hardly a problem. The show was great and I am grateful I had the opportunity to go.

After the show, we made it out and headed towards home. I hate driving back from Salt Lake any time after 10:00 p.m., because the traffic is always beastly. I headed towards home, knowing that I didn't need to take the exit to Las Vegas, because if I kept going, I should still end up on southbound I-15. Only, instead of hitting I-15, we were magically driving around Sandy. How did we get from West Valley to Sandy without knowing it? It took us a while to figure out. We could have sworn we teleported. That is, until we remembered that we had been on I-215 instead of I-80, which has totally different consequences. After we got our McDonald's treats, we located the freeway and drove happily home. No traffic, at all. It was really quite amazing.

So today we made it to church and afterward, I had a meeting for my calling. I like actually sitting in alongside the leadership of the ward and listening to everyone as we try to figure out ways to become more unified and better serve each other. The meeting went long, but it was almost fun and I have some really good ideas on how to improve my calling on the Spiritual Living Council. I headed home and Melissa and I decided to take a walk.

It was HOT! Which is such a good thing. The weather was absolutely lovely, and we walked for well over an hour and enjoyed every minute of it. We did not, however, get any good pictures. After the walk, we stopped by "The Boys'" where they re-hydrated us, and then my visiting teacher came over and then I went over to Megan's for dinner. After dinner, I spoke to my mom. Had Dustin come over to watch Kid History. Headed to Ward Prayer....

and then found out that Dustin had hacked my Facebook account.

Over all, it was an absolutely perfect weekend!

The Copper Onion & Capitol Theater

Last week I had the opportunity to have a little night on the town with a good friend of mine.

Waiting for the Opera to start.

We left work earlier than we are both used to and headed up to Salt Lake for dinner at The Copper Onion. It had come recommended from a friend of William's, and neither of us had been there. I had taken a glance at the menu before going, but didn't know what half of what was listed on there actually was. We ended up ordering a salad (that, curiously enough, tasted like feet unless you got a bite of red onion, and then tasted actually kind of good) and bone marrow.

Yes, you read that right.

Bone marrow has the density and texture of... a slug.

It didn't taste bad... it just was interesting. And now that I've had it, I can safely say that I probably won't ever eat it again. The real treat, of course, was the entrees. William got the ribs (already off the bone) which was so perfectly tender and moist and absolutely, incredibly delicious. Probably meat heaven on a fork. I got the veal meatballs. And they were also very yummy. I should have gotten pictures of those dishes.

Next we were off to...

Capitol Theatre for La Boheme. It was my first experience at the opera and I enjoyed it quite a bit. I think more now that I've had time to reflect on it. I was too busy trying to take in the whole atmosphere, that I didn't really think about the actual opera until days later. I thought it was interesting that I enjoyed the female voices more than the male. (My preferences are almost always reversed to that.) And I liked the blended voices more than solos. Also, the song about the coat was weird, and pretty pointless. It was fun to see all the different characters that attend the opera. There was a pretty large age range, dress range and appreciation range. I found myself mostly surrounded by thespians, which is always interesting.

I have to thank William again for a pleasant evening. I really liked my first experience at the opera and I definitely hope it is not my last.

The Lanyard

The Lanyard - Billy Collins

The other day I was ricocheting slowly
off the blue walls of this room,
moving as if underwater from typewriter to piano,
from bookshelf to an envelope lying on the floor,
when I found myself in the L section of the dictionary

No cookie nibbled by a French novelist
could send one into the past more suddenly -
a past where I sat at a workbench at a camp
by a deep Adirondack lake
learning how to braid long thin plastic strips
into a lanyard, a gift for my mother

I had never once seen anyone use a lanyard
or wear one, if that's what you did with them,
but that did not keep me from crossing
strand over strand again and again
until I had made a boxy
red and white lanyard for my mother.

She gave me life and milk from her breasts,
and I gave her a lanyard.
She nursed me in many a sikc room,
lifted spoons of medicine to my lips,
laid cold face-cloths on my forehead,
and then led me out into the airy light

and taught me to walk and swim,
and I, in turn, presented her with a lanyard.
Her are thousands of meals, she said,
and here is clothing and a good education.
And here is your lanyard, I replied,
which I made with a little help from a counselor.

Here is a breathing body and a beating heart,
strong legs, bones and teeth,
and two clear eyes to read the world, she whispered,
and here, I said, is the lanyard I made at camp.
And here, I wish to say to her now,
is a smaller gift - not the worn truth

that you can never repay your mother,
but the rueful admission that when she took
the two-tone lanyard from my hand,
I was as sure as a [girl] could be
that this useless, worthless thing I wove
out of boredom would be enough to make us even.

NBA musings

I was going to get all deep and do a bit of research, but man! I'm tired.

So instead, I'll just say:

1. The Bulls vs. Celtics game tonight was awesome!
2. There are some really ugly people in the NBA (see: Gasol, Vujacic, Morrison, Scola...etc) In fact, there are so many that I wanted to make a top 25 list. But really, I don't watch enough games to know where to find them all - just that they are there.
3. The oppostie of the above point is that there is also a lot of attractive guys in the NBA. (i.e. Przybilla, Milshap, Calderon, Kleiza, etc.)
4. It would be way more entertaining if the NBA was played shirts vs. skins, instead of always being restricted by jerseys.
5. The above point is not true about the WNBA. Though, I guess the rest of the list would be applicable to the women's league.
   

BYU Kind of Life

YUM YUM

Dear Kris,

I know you're married. But do you realize what you do to women? Do you realize that you are perfection with a microphone? Sing to me anytime. Oh, and you're a humble Christian boy? *SWOON* What else can I do?

I don't know if you'll win American Idol (Adam is quite the competition) but I'll buy your CD. Especially if it comes with a life-sized poster.

Love,
An obsessed fan.

PS - if you think I'm crazy, you haven't met my friends.

FHE Video Project

The Stake FHE Oscar night will be on April 18. In order to prepare for this event, our group will be submitting a video made by our family.

John and I have chosen three ideas that we liked best and have outlined below. Please use the poll on the side to choose which of these ideas are your favorite. Please take into consideration the following:

• We want to include as many people in our group as possible.
• We are all busy, so editing will be kept to a minimum. That being said, we want the best movie there, so...
• Depending on the movie, we will be filming on the 6th (at the Bishopric's) and more so on the 13th - please make an effort to be to these last FHE activities before the end of the semester.
• John and I really loved all the ideas. So thanks for your efforts yesterday.
• More info will be made available as we continue to work on this.

The IDEAS

Hot Tub Mockumentary - this movie will follow the interviews of several people remembeing the good times with the hot tub. The hot tub will not be mentioned during the actual interviews, until the very end. This will make it seem like we are talking about a wayward/lost friend.

• "We used to have so much fun together, and then one day... it was like he wasn't even trying anymore."
• "Our relationship started feeling so empty...so I had to find someone new."
• "I met all my friends through him, and now...he's not even a part of my life."

Why we like this idea: It really hits home with the Omni residents and will be able to include the majority of our group.

Another spin on this idea would be doing an actual documentary style video, with a narrator. OR, having the "Hot Tub" have a voice talking about the good times, before he was falling apart and useless.

If you vote for the hot tub idea, please leave a comment as to which version of this idea you like.

Music Video/Dance off - Choosing a favorite song and choreographing a music video.

Why we like this idea: There isn't much script writing necessary. Which means no corny lines and no flubbing up your words.

Problems: Deciding on one music video we can all participate in. Choreographing... some of us can not do simple aerobics because they can't learn the steps, let alone a full feature music video.

"LOST" Spoof - Traipsing through a wooded area in survival mode, while flashing back to our old lives. Flashback ideas: Becca dancing in her room. William winning the jackpot after smoking everyone in poker. ETC.

Why we like this idea: Honestly, it just was really funny in my head.

Problems: This will probably take the most time, energy and creativity. We'd have to be really on the ball and shoot in parts throughout the week.

Leave a comment or email me with any questions. The poll will close on Monday, April 6, at 2:00 pm (I think...around then, though) and John and I will announce the winner at the Bishopric's home that night.

Love you!

Folk vs. Pop

Today's lecture in my US & Canada class was on folk culture and popular culture. Pop culture infuriates me. Or at least, the thought that we have become so "pop culturealized" makes me ill - but yet, I am definitely part of it.

Folk cultures are really only found in primitive parts of the world. They are classified by living in rural areas or small towns. They are old-fashioned and not influenced by modern technology. Most folk cultures are self-sufficient and value strong traditions and rituals. Most importantly, they have strong relationships and a high emphasis on family.

Our wretched, but unavoidable, pop culture (my teacher has just informed us that we are not a waste of human flesh even though we are part of pop culture) is defined by being urban. We value leisure, and depend on mass production to get things. Sadly, family relationships are not as strong.We have tons of relationships, but they are weaker. Change is rapid. -- Are you beginning to understand why I detest pop culture? -- and we are more mobile and less attached to the land.

I like to think that I am a blend of both. But that really isn't true. I am a part of pop culture - with folk culture dreams. [My teacher just described a situation I find myself in quite a bit. He was describing watching someone sit at a keyboard and sticking out their index fingers. Immediately you want to pick them up and set them aside and say, "Here, let me." So true, I have the hardest time watching anyone who types slower than 75 wpm. That's what I type, on my worst days. Sometimes I can get up to 90 wpm. I'm not bragging - I'm just saying. I have a hard time watching slow typers.]

I hate change. But I love having the latest technology...sort of. I would love to have an iPhone, and a Mac Pro or whatever...even though I don't know how to use Apple products. I would like to have them. Oh man, I wish I had a nice digital camera. I love driving. I like leisure time. I use my weekends as a mini-vacation. Rarely do I use the weekend to actually WORK. *shudder* But I do value my family. I wish I were more self-sufficient. I think I would like to garden and sew. Maybe... I wish we didn't move around so much. I think I would be completely content living down the road from my parents and siblings. And grandparents, and cousins. I like the idea of living on a large piece of land surrounded by family -- with no one leaving. Hehe. It sounds fabulous. Of course, then I wouldn't have my friends from California, Utah, Pennsylvania, Michigan, Indiana, Colorado, Idaho... get the picture? Our economy doesn't allow us to live in a folk culture, and I don't think we would really enjoy going back...

But I am sick of the trends that roll through that are just retarded. I hate that our country worships celebrities. I am so disgusted with the lowering of standards, the widely accepted lifestyles that 50 years ago were taboo. I know that these lifestyles have been around since the beginning of time, but pop culture has allowed it to flourish and to be part of the norm. Since we can't revert back to our folk culture ways, I think we need to embrace some of the traditional aspects of a folk culture and start to ignore it idiocy of pop culture.

Twilight Movie Review

Becca and I went and saw the matinee on the Friday after it came out...or the Friday it did come out, I suppose. Anyway, I was very glad that we didn't try and sit in the front of the theater, or have to wait in line for an hour before the show in order to get a seat or whatever. We had decent seats, only surrounded by people still in their pajamas and with blankets wrapped around them (it was 11 a.m.) and I hoped very much that there wouldn't be screaming, squealing, or basic raucous when Edward appeared on screen, or Alice or any of them. I was nervous that I would have to deal with over excitement and giggling the whole way through. There were only two or three people that I really wanted to maim during the whole movie. I was surprised at the low number.

As you know, I've been keeping a close eye on the whole movie and its production. I've watched every clip and outtake, scene the stills, and basically anything that was posted on the internet. I checked faithfully every Twilight Tuesday for interviews with the actors and like such as. I knew the movie was going to not be everything that it could be - everything the book was. Mostly because the screenwriter was not credible. She should not have been entrusted with Edward and Bella and the Cullens as a whole. I think if they had a different screenwriter, the movie would have been fantastic. As it was, we had to deal with uncharacteristic phrases like, "It was an adrenaline rush. You can Google it." *rolls eyes dramatically*

Still, knowing that this movie was going to suck - I couldn't stop myself from giggling like several of the annoying extremists in the theater when Charlie cocked his gun before meeting Edward or when Edward jumps from Bella's truck and she scolds him because she has neighbors. I really did like the scene when Edward is wearing his little raybans (is that what they are called - the really neat sunglasses?) and escorting Bella to class while everyone stares... of course, it was ruined when Angela says, "Oh. My. God..." and then Becca leans over and recites the rest, "...Becky, look at her butt!" The way Bella discovers Edwards was a vampire was terribly rushed. Of course, it had to be...but still. I see why they condensed scenes and combined them. They didn't need Jacob to explain all the legends, the Cold Ones...they needed a reason for Bella to break off from Jessica and Angela while shopping for dresses. And in the book, we can read Bella's mind, it's her story after all, but in the movie we can't - they had to set it up. Still, the restaurant scene is pivotal in the book. It's when she and Edwards are finally, nearly, completely honest with each other. And the waitress was ridiculous - did anybody notice how AWFUL her hair was? I did like the kitchen scene, although Esme was sort of goofy and Alice's "You do smell nice" was creepy. The Claire de Lune scene and scampering up the trees as if Edward was Spiderman instead of just an incredibly strong vampire was weird...and unnecessary. And yet, the scenery was beautiful. They chose an awesome location for filming. The meadow scene was also incredibly disappointing. It was supposed to be their first date. Planned. Instead it was some random skipping portions of school. I felt like they were trying to have this deeply spiritual, romantic moment and then they skipped off back to class. Not to mention, it was still dark and creepy a bit, whereas it was supposed to be a NICE day. The baseball scene was probably my favorite. Oh, and I was terribly disappointed with how easy it was for Bella to escape to the ballet studio. I mean, seriously, Alice and Jasper were strict prison guards, she was lucky to have gotten away in the book. And they just made them both so aloof. I don't know. It was sort of retarded. And yet I expected the whole movie to be. I was just hoping to be pleasantly surprised, and yet, I wasn't.

I think that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart did a good job. I loved the guy that played Charlie, and that was really my favorite part. We got to see more of Bella's relationship with her dad. A lot of my favorite scenes had Charlie in it. Actually, I was pretty happy with the cast in general. I only hope that Taylor Lautner will rise to the occasion when he has a bigger part in New Moon. He was rough around the edges, and it didn't matter because he's not so important in Twilight. But next movie, he'll be critical. Do you think they'll get someone stronger and bigger for him after he phases? I suppose not. He might be OK.

In the end, having low expectations seemed key. Since I wasn't too terribly ecstatic about it (though, admittedly, got more so as the release date approached) I didn't have to worry about being let down. Still, it was Twilight. And I'm a Twilight addict. Therefore, I enjoyed it. I liked it - OK? I like Edward. Even in the movie when they give him uncharacteristic lines, and I had to laugh out loud at the "death glare" Robert Pattinson tries to deliver when he first smells Bella...it was ludicrous... I will inevitably own this movie. I will probably see it again when it comes to the dollar theater. Maybe twice - depending on who I can get to go with me.

Sooner vs. later: Is there an ideal age for first marriage?

I was discussing this very same topic with a coworker of mine who got married at 20. Most of my friends have gotten married between the ages of 19-24, so it is an interesting spin. In the church we are pretty much raised to think that you get married, and the sooner the better. I think trends have changed a little bit in the last few years, although, not evident in the examples of my friends...

Basically, we are groomed as Young Women to become wives and mothers. I'm not against this. In fact, I am very much a fan of traditional roles as a wife and mother - and yet, I think it puts a skewed perception on what college is for. Young Men are taught that they are to go on a mission and then immediately start searching for a spouse, who typically happens to be an itty-bitty freshman on campus.

For those of us who make it past graduation without a husband or wife in tow, I think the question is often asked, "What's wrong with you?" I don't think there is anything wrong, of course (or not always) but more that we are starting to take other things more seriously. An education is critical to be successful. Life experiences like studying abroad, or traveling for internships, or just living life before settling down is becoming increasingly more important. On top of that I think we are beginning to realize that this decision that some people have come to decide at 19 and 20 has eternal consequences. When we get married in the church, we are getting married for eternity! And I don't think that is a choice we should be making without very serious reflection (not that my friends didn't take the time to realize this... only, sometimes I wonder how much hormones were involved over the actual realization of the fact).

So is it so bad that we are getting married a little later in life? I've heard talk of this in church about how we get married younger because we know that marriage is important, etc. And that those that are putting marriage off are secular and of the world and things like that. I have to disagree. The church seems to be following a similar pattern. I've lived in two wards where the median age is 25 or older, and we are all single. I think this is a sign that marriage is being taken more seriously. And I think I am finally going to make it to 25 without being thought an old-maid because I'm still single.

By Sharon Jayson, USA TODAY

Emily Becker wanted to be married by age 30. In June, at age 28, she and Joe Becker, 29, were married. They were the last of their group to tie the knot.

Even though they began dating in 2003 — around the same time as most of their friends — "it took us almost twice as long to get married," she says. "We both knew we wanted to marry each other. We just kept having to put it off."

The reason? Careers. Both are doctors. They spent four years in medical school. Three years of residency were in different cities. They got engaged in October of last year and now live in San Francisco.

"If we had been together in the same city, I think maybe we would have married sooner," he says.

Like many young adults today, the Beckers waited to marry until they felt the time was right. Others are also holding off while maintaining a single-but-together status that can last years. That may be one reason the age at first marriage has been climbing steadily for all racial, ethnic and socioeconomic groups. The median age is now the oldest since the U.S. Census started keeping track in the 1890s: almost 26 for women and almost 28 for men.

And as young people wait longer to marry, there is growing debate over whether waiting is a good idea, and if so, how long is best. Those who advocate marriage in the early to mid-20s say that's the age when the pool of possible mates is larger, it's when couples can "grow up" together and it's prime for childbearing. But others favor the late 20s or early 30s, saying maturity makes for happier unions and greater economic security — both of which make divorce less likely.

As a result, researchers, sociologists and family experts are taking a closer look at the attitudes behind the trend to see if there really is an optimum age to marry that maximizes the benefits of matrimony and minimizes possible problems.

"It's better not to get married as a teenager," says sociologist Andrew Cherlin of Johns Hopkins University. "Beyond that, I don't think there's an ideal age."

But people do have opinions about it, and those beliefs are clearly changing. In a 1946 Gallup Poll, most found the ideal age to be 25 for men and 21 for women. Sixty years later, in a Gallup telephone poll of about 500 adults, the ideal age had increased to 25 for women and 27 for men.

"A lot of girls have this ideal age for when they want to get married, but a lot don't vocalize it because you don't want to jinx yourself," says Jessica Lim, 30, a graphic designer in New York.

"For me, the ideal age was around 28. I think I was wanting to meet that goal and feeling like I needed to be there at 28, where my fiancé, who is just a few years older than me, wasn't there yet."

It's well documented that those who marry before age 20 are two to three times more likely to divorce, researchers say. But studies are still trying to determine whether marrying at certain ages may improve relationships and help marriages survive.

A study being drafted by sociologist Norval Glenn of the University of Texas-Austin finds that those who marry in the early to mid-20s are slightly happier and less likely to break up than those who marry in the later 20s, but are significantly more satisfied with their relationships than those who marry at 30 or older.

Older may be better

But research by sociologist Paul Amato of Pennsylvania State University for a 2007 book he co-wrote suggests quite the opposite. The studies for Alone Together: How Marriage in America Is Changing used different data and different criteria and found distinct benefits to marrying older.

"We found that the delay in marriage was actually a good thing and it actually improved the average marital quality by a fair amount," he says.

"Older marriages (30s vs. 20s) were more cohesive in the sense they did things more often together as a couple. And couples who married at older ages were less likely to report thinking about divorce or that their marriage was in trouble."

Two yet-unpublished papers co-written by Jason Carroll, an associate professor of family life at Brigham Young University, reviewed data collected in 2004-06 based on student questionnaires of 448 items. One study of 788 college students ages 18-25 from five campuses across the country analyzed marriage readiness by asking "Do you think that you are ready to be married?" Most weren't: 60% of men and 67% of women answered "no," and only 9% of men and 5% of women said "yes." Almost one-third of men and 28% of women said "in some ways yes, in some ways no."

The other study asked young adults and their parents about the best age to marry. The sample of 536 students from the five campuses said 25 was ideal, while parents — 446 mothers and 360 fathers — said 26 was better.

Debra Lermitte of Abington, Pa., has four children and two stepchildren, 26 to 31. She first married at 19 and was divorced after 15 years. She says it's better to wait: "You get to experience life and know yourself better, and hopefully choose someone more compatible once you become your own person as an adult."

That's the message Jamie Hayworth, 25, says she received from her parents. A mental health therapist in Torrance, Calif., Hayworth earned her graduate degree in June. She and her fiancé became engaged in February. Hayworth says she used to worry that she would be too selfish to be married.

"I just felt like for me, I was still thinking in terms of, 'What do I want to do with my life? What do I want to accomplish? Where do I want to live?' " she says.

This relatively new clash between marriage and individualism is discussed in Cherlin's new book —The Marriage-Go-Round: The State of Marriage and the Family in America Today, to be published in April.

Not until they're 'ready'

"People are more concerned with their own self-development than they used to be," Cherlin says. "People are postponing marriage until everything in their lives is working in order. The order means after you've finished your education, perhaps after beginning your career, and increasingly after you've lived with your partner. They're postponing marriage until they think they're ready for it."

Brian Benator, 23, an assistant men's basketball coach at North Georgia College and State University in Dahlonega, Ga., graduated in May from the University of Georgia and is pursuing an MBA while working full time.

His focus is on career and financial stability; marriage is not on his mind just yet.

"I think a year or two after college is the time to learn about yourself personally, as well as in the working environment," he says. "Hopefully, I'd like to be settled in the next six years, but it's easier said than done because I'm going to be moving all the time."

Marriage used to be the first step into adulthood, but now it is often the last, which Cherlin says has some implications: A lower proportion of today's young adults will ever marry (though most still will), and they likely will have fewer children.

"I'm not one who thinks waiting to marry is causing a problem here. I think the lives of today's young adults are becoming better and their marriages are becoming more stable. Where I see a potential crunch is young adults who want to have more than two children," he says.

Those who do worry include John Van Epp, a clinical counselor in Medina, Ohio, and family therapist Alan Singer, who has offices in New York City and Highland Park, N.J. Both say many young adults view marriage as something in the distant future.

Van Epp presented a program this summer about the repercussions of marrying in the late 20s and early 30s. Singer's blog urges parents to change the wait-to-marry message. He's particularly worried that medical advances in treating infertility are giving couples the wrong idea.

"It gives people confidence — almost invincibility — that we can delay these things and science will rescue us," he says.

Fertility researcher Richard Paulson of the University of Southern California says that, as a general rule, women should start having children no later than age 30 and be done by 35, when statistics show fertility declines.

The federal government is also taking new interest in these young adults. The National Healthy Marriage Resource Center, a government-supported clearinghouse, hired a market research firm to survey 3,600 adults ages 18-30 and will target that demographic with a website expected to launch next year.

Although preliminary, the data have identified distinct but very diverse attitudes, ranging from those who can't wait to marry to those who are afraid to marry and others in between. Just over 20% of those sampled have very low motivation for marriage; they view it as a risk that interferes with their independence or they were fearful of divorce.

Researchers say divorce rates are down for the better-educated. Those with college degrees marry later, have better jobs and more income. But an analysis of 2006 Census data by the American Council on Education finds that only 35% of those 25-29 have an associate's degree or higher.

The Beckers' extended education may bode well for their marriage, even though Emily Becker says it's tough to see their friends already settled with kids as the Beckers just begin married life.

"I've now found out marriage is such a wonderful thing, I wish people would have told me to get married sooner because I had found the right guy," she says. "But I'm actually glad we waited because we knew what we were getting into."

I refuse to listen... you cannot make me!

The annual WalMart boycott has begun. I made the mistake of going to said store earlier last week, needing just a few items for dinner group. As I was strolling along the aisle, looking for stir fry seasoning, I noticed that the music in WalMart was somewhat different. There were strange bells, and it was all classical, and I couldn't peg exactly...

And then it hit me.

EVERY YEAR I have to go through this. The WalMart fast, all because they play Christmas music from November 1 until December 31. Can I just remind you... that there are at least two holidays in between that time (three if you are counting my birthday) - 3 HOLIDAYS! And they are just skipping right over the most important holiday of the autumn season - that being, THANKSGIVING!

So:

(Just so you remember, the WalMart boycott will only last through the month of November. It's too cheap to give up altogether!)

I love Thanksgiving. I love everything about it (when done "right") and I HATE to see is skipped over just because WalMart thinks they can make a few extra bucks in sales by reminding people that Christmas is on its way and they should start buying now through music. It's like subliminal messaging, only blatant!

In other news: I think I am going to boycott Macey's as well. And definitely all the radio sations that have already started playing Christmas songs. Why don't they make Thanksgiving songs? Anyway, I was walking down Macey's Seasonal/Promotional aisle, and you'll never guess what I saw. Oh wait, I'm sure you can... Christmas...Christmas...more Christmas. Reds and Greens, Elves and Santas. Candies of all sorts donning reindeer and Christmas trees. Rows and rows and rows of candy canes. Oh, and one eenie-weinie space for Autumn things. Autumn things! Not even Thanksgiving, just autumn in general. For all I know, they had it on display during Halloween and didn't bother to move it in order to make room for all their too-early Christmas items.

It makes me sick. And irate. And irritated.

Why is it that people and stores can't be like me. Come December 1, you'll hear nothing coming from my speakers but Christmas music. I'll have my house decked out in lights and garland. I'll be enjoying Christmas the right way, in its right time.

I encourage you to do the same.

Thank goodness for pilgrims! Thanks for turkey and mashed potatoes. And ROLLS! But more importantly Thanks for my family, for my Savior, the gospel, living prophets, the scriptures, good roommates, wonderful friends, a free nation, pillows and blankets, an education, technology, good music, being well fed, having a job, a car that runs, a phone to communicate with, and everything else Heavenly Father has been so generous to give.

Spread the Word

I couldn't help but share this, mostly because it is what I have been telling people for about four years now.

Dear BA Foodist,

Can you set me straight on tipping? I was once told that 20 percent is for great service, 15 percent for bad. Unless a waiter's gone overboard, I'm an 18 percenter, but I was recently accused of being stingy. Am I wrong, or wasn't 10 percent considered fair not too long ago? Give me a tip I can use. --TIPPER G., Albuquerque

Dear Tipper G.,

Ah, the great tipping conundrum.

It's disappointing to receive anything less than 20 percent of the total bill. Most waiters at today's better restaurants expect that much for average service, and even more if they do it with a smile. So unless you're planning never to go to the same restaurant twice, the days of 10 percent tips--and even 15 percent tips--are long gone.

Waiting tables is a job everyone should be forced to do at least once, if only to learn that it's not okay to snap your fingers when you want something, and also to find out what it's like to eke out a living on tips.

The BA Foodist's Tipping Rules

RULE NO. 1: Unless the server is rude, condescending, and/or completely absent, tip between 18 and 20 percent.

RULE NO. 2: Never tip on tax. Tip based on the subtotal. And if you're calculating your tip simply by doubling the tax, stop it--you're being cheap.

RULE NO. 3: Unless you drink like Dean Martin or have a taste for expensive wines (i.e., $40 or more, depending on your budget), it's best to include booze when calculating a tip. Bartenders expect a dollar tip per drink (which is usually about 20 percent of the drink's price), and it's no different with waiters.

RULE NO. 4: Never turn a blind eye when others are tipping--especially if they're unfamiliar with our tipping culture (i.e., Europeans). If you think your tablemate is lowballing the service, it's best to hand the waiter a few bills on the way out.

RULE NO. 5: If a few dollars here and there really matter that much to your bank account, perhaps you shouldn't be going out to eat in the first place.

Article located here.

Daddy's Little Girl

Our amazing apartment is in charge of the Spotlight for ward prayer next week, and in an effort to be different and creative, we decided to quiz our dad's and see what they knew about us. It was rather hilarious...

My dad knows what he answered for each question...but I thought I'd give him the RIGHT ones.

1. What is your daughter's favorite band?

• John Mayer, Ludo, Muse
• Also accepted: Armor for Sleep, Michael Buble, Maroon 5, Norah Jones, Boyz II Men, Landon Pigg, Dashboard Confessionals, Coldplay, Weezer, Placebo...etc.
• Dad's answer: Josh Groban
• To be fair... I actually do own two of Josh's CDs, and I like him quite a bit. Though, I wouldn't peg him as a favorite.

2. Where in the world would your daughter like to travel?

• Anywhere outside the U.S.
• Also accepted: UK, Scotland, Ireland, Germany, France, Italy, Greece, Brazil, Peru, Barbados, Jamaica, Bali, Australia, Thailand, etc.
• Dad's answer: Europe!
• You got it right...I want to go to Europe more than I want to go anywhere else in the world. But the country changes almost daily.

3. What are some of your daughter's hobbies?

• Dad nailed this on the head: reading, writing, pretending to play basketball (really I just LOVE it)
  
• Also accepted: working, school work, blogging, listening to music, baking, and watching movies.
  
• Looking at this list, I realize that my hobbies lack in actual ACTIVITY. Guess I need to work on that.
  

4. What would be an ideal date?

• Some sort of sports event (basketball or football preferred) followed by a long walk.
• Dad's answer: going to a fancy restaurant
• To be fair: That's a good answer. I LOVE trying new places. And I like things to be fancy. I think we seriously lack reasons to get dressed up...

5. What sort of qualities are you looking for in a man?

• Someone who is masculine, hilarious, worthy priesthood holder, and ambitious/a provider
• Also accepted: well, there are lots, but those are the main ones
• Dad's answer: Has testimony, is funny, and has common-sense
• Everyone loved that "commen-sense" bit, and it made me laugh. Dad always talks about how it is something his mother tried/did teach him and something I know he tried to teach me. Sometimes I exhibit common sense, othertimes, (like now at 1:30 a.m.) I do not.
• Also, if he happened to referee basketball, that would be quite the icing on the cake!
  

Thanks for playing, Dad! Apparently you and I need to have a little more girl talk; then I'm sure you'll get them all right next time!

I LOVE YOU!

Throw Your Clothes on the Floor

Ever since the trip to the Scera theater to watch Pride and Prejudice the musical (along with the lesbian lovers and other side shows the musical aided in providing) we have been planning to attend tonight's Boyz II Men concert. We have listened to their II CD over and over... or at least some of their songs over and over and over and over. And we made t-shirts, complete with Rhinestones. So tonight, we were ready... and we enjoyed almost every minute of it. Or would have, had we been able to see the stage!


Recipe for the best night ever:

1. 1 Grassy knoll
2. 1 beautiful, cloudless night with a sky full of stars
3. 6 large Polynesian men
4. the Polynesians' amazon women (some were white...still HUGE)
5. 2 Awesome roommates
6. 1 HOT BYU basketball player -his girlfriend
7. BOYZ II MEN!!!!
8. frozen yogurt

We went to the concert with high expectations. Arriving at 6:55 p.m. when the concert was supposed to start at 8:00 p.m. We walked in and the blanketed area was already full. Content to sit at the top of the hill overlooking the rest of the area and stage, we entertained ourselves by taking pictures.





Our fun was disrupted when some guy came with his little blanket and tried to squeeze into a almost non-existent spot, claiming to be "desperate" for a place to sit (the place was packed and it was still forty-five minutes until start time) in front of the group of Polynesian women (so called because their dates/husbands were Polys, not necessarily because they were...all were Amazon women, though) to which they said they would scoot their blanket forward and he could place his blanket in front of us. While it was just him, we were reluctant but willing to "cut" in front of us... That is, until he started listening to our conversations and making faces at us. He offered to take some of our pictures, to which we declined.

When the show started, we were treated to a talent show of some sort. Most the acts were decent, but nothing too spectacular. Until an 11-year old got up and started singing I Will Always Love You. I've seen so many people butcher this song on American Idol, that I thought, there is no way this girl can pull it off. And yet, I was proven wrong! This girl nailed it. Definitely winner, hands down. She was amazing, and 11.

The cutter's friends showed up... more white Amazons. I can't believe how big these women are. I didn't know big women existed in Provo. They were fat. They were stalky. And tall. HUGE women, and blocking our view to the stage. I always thought that Provo was full of super skinny barbie types, with their bleach blonde, teased hair and perfect nails and...you know the type. But these girls were like nothing I'd ever seen. I was suddenly very pissed at the man and his "desperate" act. How could he have ever expected to squeeze between the Polynesians and the rest of the crowd? His women-folk were just as big!

FINALLY after waiting forever, Boyz II Men came out! Even minus one member of the group, they are amazing. Velvet and silky R&B voices, and so incredibly smooth. From what we could see of them, little glimpses here and there through heads and elbows and giant Polynesians, they were still hot! They sounded great. They were awesome.


Since we couldn't watch our Boyz the whole time, we watched the next best thing... the BYU baksetball played that had to have been 7' tall, and georgeous to boot. I thought Ashley was going to jump his bones, but his girlfriend eventually joined him. Making it uncomfortable to watch him... luckily we had found an opening where we could see more glimpses.

A few more Polynesian guys came in late and instead of trying to maneuver through Desperate boy and his group to meet up with the other Polys, they stood next to us awhile. I was standing on my tippy-toes and jumping trying to see over the mountain of women and the guy turned to me and said, "Hey, you can sit on his shoulders," pointing to his friend. I looked over, tipped my head all the way back and laughed out loud. This guy was 8' tall, HUGE! And cute. And HUGE! He towered over everyone! His friend disappeared and the giant Polynesian stood videotaping the concert, I watched from his camera for a few minutes... I couldn't believe how big he was. It was awesome.

Between the tall Polynesians and the sexy, deep voice of one of the Boyz II Men guys, I was near to swooning every ten minutes!

When they sang the Momma song, they made everyone get out their cell phones and call their mothers to dedicate it to them... it was pretty cute. But my mom was asleep. So we listened to Becca sing to her mom.

After the concert, we went to Hello Yogurt. Only the best Yogurt shop on the planet! It was so delicious. There are like six different flavors (Cheesecake, Chocolate, Strawberry, Peach, Pecan, and tart) and then you pick whatever you want to put on top and then pay by weight. It was SO YUMMY!

Overall, best night ever.

21st Century Pariah

I've always thought this was the case... in fact, I know I've said so many a time. However, KP brought it to my attention once again. She pointed out that maybe, perhaps, for some reason... I don't belong in the 21st century.

You probably don't think this is the case. I mean, after all, I have adapted QUITE well, considering. I use the internet and computers with skill and finesse. Having such a vast amount of knowledge at my fingertips is...wonderful. Irreplaceable. In fact, I just spent five seconds looking up lyrics to a song that I'm listening to. I love my portable music/cell phone/calculator/alarm clock/watch/text messaging machine. I LOVE the vast amount of music that is avaialable. MUSE, LUDO, Boys II Men...haha. Ask my dad, my computer is FULL of music. And I listen to way more than I own on Pandora. It is SO nice being able to talk to my parents 2,000 miles away in Ohio, or my friends living in Michigan or California or Idaho. I spend more time in front of the television and movie theaters than necessary. I love traveling, and despite how difficult it is with the TSA crap we have to go through every time we fly - it's not like we're sailing over the ocean in a boat filled with plague or bumping around in horse and buggy. Or walking. I love driving, despite the price of gas. I DIE of heat on a daily basis, despite the wonderful air conditioning that cools everything...except my car. *shrug* Oh, and there's the whole medical thing, and drugs and advancements made in feminie hygiene and such.

Okay, maybe living in a different century would be hard. Well, not maybe. It would be. Could I give up all of those advantages? Those are just the luxury luxuries. What about the hot, running water? What about the fact that I can go to the store and have all vitamins and minerals available with foods that aren't even in season, but somehow still available? Or the fact that there are vaccinations against all sorts of deadly diseases? If I were born in the 1700s, I might have died before reaching age 5 of some sort of mumps, measles, typhus, etc. I guess the great thing about being born in another century would be that I wouldn't know any different. I wouldn't think that it was harder, because I wouldn't know it could be easier. Of course, this is all sounding as if I had the option - which I don't.

But it's definitely going to be one of the questions I ask Heavenly Father when I get back to Him. Why? Why 1985 and not 1785 or 1885? Both times seem MUCH more interesting and definitely have more appeal than now. I mean, these were times when new places were being discovered, countries shaped, inventions that changed lifestyles were being invented. Now, it's like we've lost all creativity. Sure we have new versions of things coming out all the time, but it's the same thing. Over and over and over. These people were inventing things that had never been seen before.

Plus, there were a lot more rules and standards, and etiquette. Now, granted, I'm not the most proper person in the world. I think I would have liked to live during all of that only for the sake of breaking all the societal rules. Like showing off my ankle! Yes, I would be quite rebellious. Now, if I want to be rebellious, I have to walk around naked...and even then, some places it's acceptable. *shudder*

Fortunately, after daydreaming about all the romantic adventures I would have had living in 1808, I remember that all the books I read (Gabaldon, Gist, Ibbotson, McClure, etc.) are writing about just that...romantic adventures. Granted, they all write about the disease and malnutrition, famine, natural disasters, dying of a fever, etc. etc. etc. (Especially Gabaldon, she does not soften the blow of the hardships at all.) But still, they are fictional stories that characterize the main characters as still these beautiful people where love conquers all...even disease. I know it's not realistic. I look at pictures of cowboys and such from the 1800s, and they were not the handsome, beautiful, rugged, masculine...*sigh* men that I imagine when I'm reading about Ryder Maddox or Brevan McClean. I KNOW that. I do. I sear.

Doesn't mean I like living in 2008, all of the time.

Back to Horse and Buggy

Horses are not cheap animals to care for. You have to pay for shoeing, saddling, food, equipment for exercising, and maintenance... and yet, with all this nonsense of raised fuel prices making it nearly impossible to find a plane ticket for under $400 and costing just as much to drive half the distance you used to be able to for the same prices... *breath*... maybe I should invest.

I miss the olden (olden, as in golden?) days where things were simple. Families lived close to one another. We were able to provide for ourselves through our own gardens, clothe ourselves without worrying which brand our dresses, and jeans, and shoes were. Men worked at home, taking pride in their land and their own work - instead of paying everyone to do things they should have learned when they were still young. Women worked in the home, supporting their husbands and having babies. Wait, how can I miss these days, when I never actually lived them? Well, I miss the idea of them, anyway. Honestly, I think the feminist movement really ruined things for me... but that's a topic for a different post.

Whether I lived them or not, one thing is for sure. If I don't get home now - as in move home, closer to my family - then I may NEVER get back. It's getting just too expensive to travel. Why can't we pay $5 train passes to travel across the country? How much did it cost to sail over the Atlantic to go to Europe? I would really love to go there, but now that it is getting SO expensive to travel, I sometimes wonder how I am going to afford getting to Clearfield (a 1 1/2 hour drive, and about half a tank) or Boise (a 4-5 hour drive, and a whole tank of gas) let alone across the oceans!

I am grateful for technology and advancements...really. I like the computer. I love typing and blogs and emailing and searching the vast knowledge of the web. I like how quickly news travels whether its between members of my family, or members of the world. Cell phones are awesome. They are so nice to multi-task. To be walking through the grocery store and talk to my mom who is 2,000 miles away, is the BEST thing ever. And let's be frank for a minute - the technology that allows us to have tampons instead of rags, birth control pills instead of crazy, out-of-control, periods is SUPER nice. Along with the amazing advancements in medicine, and education, SOME of the fashion, make-up, etc. etc. etc. I know we are blessed. I know that technology has done a lot to advance us as a people, a society, and the Church. How cool is it that we can listen to prophets teach us from Salt Lake or BYU or where ever, at the very time they are speaking? It's amazing! But, I think, I would give up some of these luxuries to go back to a simpler, cleaner (as in less pollution...and less acceptance of pornography and other vulgar things that have recently - well, not SO recently - been accepted into society) and more appealing lifestyle.

Anyone with me?

Probably not... I'm not a leader in the movement to simplicity - but if anyone is interested, I'd definitely be a follower! (Oh, but can we NOT go to the FLDS church style dresses? We can still be ATTRACTIVE simpletons.)

Did you write this, Courtney?

So, I'm going through old emails and I find this... a forward. Something that I've kept and haven't read in over 4 years. Today I did. It doesn't state its origin, but I'm pretty sure Courtney may have wrote it. (I know this is a high compliment, Cort. Try not to let it go to your head.)

I dare you all to try one of these.

Confuse Your Roommate

1. Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat. Then leave "Slim Jim" wrappers on the floor and lie on the bed holding your stomach everytime your roommate walks in. If he/she asks about the wrappers, say you know nothing about them.

2. Get some hair. Disperse it around your roommate’s head while he/she is asleep. Keep a pair of scissors by your bed. Snicker at your roommate every morning.

3. Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You’re back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn’t you be going somewhere?"

4. Trash the room when your roommate’s not around. Then leave and wait for your roommate to come back. When he/she does, walk in and act surprised. Say, "Uh-oh, it looks like, THEY, were here again."

5. Every time you see your roommate yell, "You son of a..." and kick him/her in the stomach. Then buy him/her some ice cream.

6. Set your roommate’s bed on fire. Apologize and explain that you’ve been watching too much "Beavis & Butthead." Do it again. Tell him/her that you’re not sorry because this time, they deserved it.

7. Put your glasses on before you go to bed. Take them off as soon as you wake up. If your roommate asks, explain that they are Magic Dream Glasses. Complain that you’ve been having terrible nightmares.

8. Eat lots of "Lucky Charms." Pick out all the yellow moons and stockpile them in the closet. If your roommate inquires, explain that visitors are coming, but you can’t say anything more, or you’ll have to face the consequences.

9. Set up meetings with your roommate’s faculty advisor. Inquire about his/her academic potential. Take lots of notes, and then give your roommate a full report. Insist that he/she do the same.

10. "Drink" a raw egg for breakfast every morning. Explain that you are in training. Eat a dozen donuts every night.

11. Every Thursday, pack up everything you own and tell your roommate you’re going home. Come back in an hour and explain that no one was home. Unpack everything and go to sleep.

12. Every time you wake up, start yelling, "Oh, my Gosh! Where the heck am I?!" and run around the room for a few minutes. Then go back to bed. If your roommate asks, say you don’t know what he/she is talking about.

13. Draw a tiny, black spot on your arm. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, "It’s spreading, it’s spreading."

14. Buy a McDonald’s "Happy Meal" for lunch every day. Eat the straw and the napkin. Throw everything else away.

15. Buy a plant. Sleep with it at night. Talk to it. After a few weeks, start to argue with it loudly. Then yell, "I can’t live in the same room with you," storm out of the room and slam the door. Get rid of the plant, but keep the pot. Refuse to discuss the plant ever again.

16. Buy a Jack-In-The-Box. Every day, turn the handle until the clown pops out. Scream continuously for twenty minutes.

17. Hang up pictures of chickens all over the room. If your roommate eats eggs, yell at him/her and call him/her a cannibal.

18. Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you’re doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon...."

19. Lock the door while your roommate is out. When he/she comes back and tries to unlock it, yell, "Don’t come in, I’m naked!" Keep this up for several hours. When you finally let your roommate in, immediately take off all of your clothes, and ignore your roommate.

20. Bring in potential "new" roommates from around campus. Give them tours of the room and the building. Have them ask about your roommate in front of him/her, and reply, "Oh, him/her? He/she won’t be here much longer."

21. If your roommate comes home after midnight, hit him/her on the head with a rolling pin. Immediately go to bed, muttering, "Ungrateful little..."

22. Pile dirty dishes in your roommate’s bed. Insist that you don’t know how they got there.

23. Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

24. Feign a serious illness for two weeks. Have a priest come to your room and visit you. Write out a will, leaving everything to your roommate. One day, miraculously "recover." Insist that your roommate write out a will, leaving everything to you. Every time he/she coughs, excitedly say, "Oooh, are you dying?"

25. Live in the hallway for a month. Afterwards, bring all of your stuff back into the room and tell your roommate, "Okay, your turn."

26. Keep a tarantula in a jar for three days. Then get rid of the tarantula. If your roommate asks, say, "Oh, he’s around here somewhere."

27. Tell your roommate, "I’ve got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can’t remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

28. Bowl inside the room. Set up tournaments with other people in the building. Award someone a trophy. If your roommate wants to bowl too, explain that he/she needs bowling shoes.

29. Walk backwards all the time. Then pretend to trip and hurt yourself. Fake an injury and go through a long, painful recovery. Start walking backwards again.

30. While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

31. Explain to your roommate that you’re going to be housing a prospective student in the near future. One day, bring in a pig. If your roommate protests, hug the pig and tell your roommate that he/she hurt its feelings. Watch T.V with the pig, eating lots of bacon.

32. Make a sandwich. Don’t eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich!?" Complain loudly that you are hungry.

33. Punch a hole in the T.V. Sit and watch it anyway, complaining about the poor picture quality.

34. Wear a cape. Stand in front of an open window for about an hour every day. Then, one day, when your roommate is gone, go outside and lie down underneath the window, pretending to be hurt, and wait for your roommate to return. The next day, start standing in front of the window again.

35. Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate’s potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate’s potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, "He just didn’t belong."

36. Fill an empty shaving cream can with whipped cream. Use it to shave, and then spray some into your mouth. Later on, complain that you feel sick. Continue this process for several weeks.

37. Cover your bed with a tent. Live inside it for a week. If your roommate asks, explain that "It’s a jungle out there." Get your roommate to bring you food and water.

38. Keep a vacuum cleaner in the middle of the room. Look at it with fear for a few days. Then stay out of the room entirely, opening the door only a crack and whispering to your roommate, "Psst! Is it gone?"

39. Break the window with a rock. If your roommate protests, explain that you were hot. Open and close the broken window as you normally would.

40. Throw darts at a bare wall. All of a sudden, act excited, telling your roommate that you hit the bull’s eye.

41. Send flowers to your roommate, with a card that says, "I’m sorry. It won’t happen again." When you see them, start ripping up the flowers. Repeat the process for a few weeks.

42. Call your roommate "Clyde" by accident. Start doing so every so often. Increase the frequency over the next few weeks, until you are calling him "Clyde" all the time. If your roommate protests, say, "I’m sorry. I won’t do that anymore, Murray."

43. Hire a night watchman to guard the room while you are sleeping.

44. Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.

45. Practice needlepoint every night. At one point, grab your thumb and scream, "Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!" Cry hysterically for a few minutes, and then go to bed. Sob and sniff all night.

46. When your roommate comes in, pretend that you are on the phone, screaming angrily and shouting obscenities. After you hang up, say, "That was your mom. She said she’d call back."

47. Every time your roommate comes in, immediately turn off the lights and go to bed. When he/she leaves, get up and loudly yell, "Okay, guys, you can come out now."

48. Start wearing a crown, all the time. If your roommate tells you to take it off, say, "What the heck do you think you are? A king?"

49. Sit in front of a chess board for hours, saying nothing, doing nothing. Then, look up and say, "I think this game goes a lot faster with two players."

50. Talk back to your "Rice Krispies." All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."

51. Change the locks on the door. Don’t let your roommate in unless he/she says the secret word. Change the secret word often. If your roommate can’t guess the secret word, make him/her pay for a clue.

52. Scatter stuffed animals around the room. Put party hats on them. Play loud music. When your roommate walks in, turn off the music, take off the party hats, put away the stuffed animals, and say, "Well, it was fun while it lasted."

53. Hang a tire swing from the ceiling. Act like a monkey. If someone besides your roommate comes in, cease acting like a monkey and claim that the tire swing was your roommate’s idea. When you and your roommate are alone again, continue acting like a monkey.

54. Unplug everything in the room except for one toaster. Pray to the toaster. Bring it gifts. Throw some of your roommate’s possessions out the window. Say that the toaster made you do it.

55. Challenge your roommate to a duel. If he refuses, claim that you have won by forfeit and therefore conquered his side of the room. Insist that he remove all of his possessions immediately.

56. Sign your roommate up for various activities. (Campus tour guide, blood donor, organ donor).

57. Start dressing like an Indian. If your roommate inquires, claim that you are getting in touch with your NativeAmerican roots. If your roommate accuses you of not having any NativeAmerican roots, claim that he/she has offended your people and put a curse on your roommate.

58. Wear your shoes on the wrong feet, all the time. Constantly complain that your feet hurt.

59. Hit your roommate on the head with a brick. Claim that you were trying to kill a mosquito.

60. Steal something valuable of your roommate’s. If he/she asks about it, tell him/her that you traded it for some magic beans. Give some beans to your roommate.

61. Instead of turning off the light switch, smash the light bulb with a hammer. Put a new bulb in the next day. Complain often about the cost of light bulbs.

62. Videotape yourself hammering a nail into a wall for a while, and then stopping. Play the tape in your room. Right before the hammering stops on the videotape, look at the screen and say, "Don’t do that."

63. Buy a lamp. Tell your roommate it’s a magic lamp, with a genie inside it. Spend a week thinking about what to wish for. At the end of the week, report that someone has released the genie from the lamp. Blame your roommate.

64. Whenever your roommate brushes his/her teeth, watch him/her do so. Take notes. Write a paper on it, and circulate it around campus. If your roommate protests, say, "The people have a right to know!"

65. Collect potato chips that you think look like famous people. Find one that looks like your roommate. Burn it, and explain, "It had to be done."

66. Read the phone book out loud and excitedly. ("Frank Johnson! Oh, wow! 837-9494! Holy cow!")

67. Shadow box several times a day. One day, walk in looking depressed. If your roommate asks what’s wrong, explain that your shadow can’t box with you anymore due to an injury. Ask your roommate if you can box with his/her shadow.

68. When you walk into the room, look at your roommate in disgust and yell, "Oh, you’re here!" Walk away yelling and cursing.

69. Put up flyers around the building, reporting that your roommate is missing. Offer a reward for his/her safe return.

70. Buy a watermelon. Draw a face on it and give it a name. Ask your roommate if the watermelon can sleep in his/her bed. If your roommate says no, drop the watermelon out the window. Make it look like a suicide. Say nasty things about your roommate at the funeral.

71. Draw a chalk outline on the floor. When your roommate comes in, say, "Don’t worry. It’s not what you think." If he/she asks about it again, immediately change the subject.

72. Drink a cup of coffee every morning. When you finish it, gnaw on the mug for about ten minutes. Then, look at your roommate, immediately put the mug away, and quickly leave the room.

73. Paint a tunnel on the wall like they do in cartoons. Every day, hit your head as you attempt to crawl through it. Hold your head and grumble, "Dern road runner...."

74. Leave memos on your roommate’s bed that say things like, "I know what you did," and "Don’t think you can fool me." Sign them in blood.

75. Hold a raffle, offering your roommate as first prize. If he/she protests, tell him/her that it’s all for charity.

76. Make cue cards for your roommate. Get them out whenever you’d like to have a conversation.

77. Talk like a pirate, all the time. Threaten to make your roommate walk the plank if he/she doesn’t swab the deck. Arrrrrrrrrrrgh!

78. Set up about twenty plants in an organized formation. When your roommate walks in, pretend to be in the middle of delivering a speech to the plants. Whisper to them, "We’ll continue this later," while eyeing your roommate suspiciously.

79. Buy a telescope. Sit on your bed and look across the room at your roommate through the telescope. When you’re not using the telescope, act like your roommate is too far away for you to see.

80. Keep some worms in a shoebox. When doing homework, go and consult with the worms every so often. Then become angry, shouting at the worms that they’re stupid and they don’t know what they’re talking about.

81. Watch "Psycho" every day for a month. Then act excited every time your roommate goes to take a shower.

82. Wear a paper hat. Every time your roommate walks in, say, "Welcome to McDonalds, can I take your... Oh, it’s just you." Take off the hat, sit, and pout.

83. Go through your roommate’s textbooks with a red pen, changing things and making random corrections. If your roommate protests, tell him/her that you just couldn’t take it anymore.

84. Leave the room at random, knock on the door, and wait for your roommate to let you back in. If he/she asks about it, go on a tangent about the importance of good manners.

85. Hang a horseshoe above the door. Make up stories about having had good luck. Then, take the horseshoe down and wrap your head in bandages. When you see your roommate, look above the door where the horseshoe used to be, hold your head, and mutter, "Stupid horseshoe...."

86. Carve a jack-o-lantern. Complain to your roommate that the jack-o-lantern has been staring at you. The next day, tell your roommate that the jack-o-lantern thinks he/she has been staring at it. Confide in your roommate that you really don’t like the jack-olantern, but you can’t convince it to move out.

87. As soon as your roommate turns the light off at night, begin singing famous operas as loud as you can. When your roommate turns on the light, look around and pretend to be confused.

88. Hang a basketball net on the wall. Challenge your refrigerator to basketball games, and play them in front of your roommate. Do so for about a month. Confide in your roommate that you think the refrigerator has been taking steroids.

89. Drink lots of lemonade. Talk obnoxiously for hours about how much you love lemonade. Then, one day, paint your face yellow. From then on, complain about how much you hate lemonade.

90. Late at night, start conversations that begin with, "Remember the good old days, when we used to..." and make up stories involving you and your roommate.

91. Whenever your roommate sneezes, go and hide in the closet for about and hour. Look around nervously for the rest of the day.

92. Sit and stare at your roommate for hours. Bring others in to join you. Eat peanuts, throwing a few at your roommate. Then say, "Boy, these zoos just aren’t what they used to be."

93. Tell your roommate that your toe hurts, and that means there’s going to be an earthquake, soon. While your roommate is out, trash everything on his/her side of the room. When he/she returns, explain that the earthquake hit, but only on one side of the room.

94. Buy a gun. Clean it every day. One day, put a band-aid on your forehead, and refuse to discuss the gun ever again.

95. Buy a lobster. Pretend to play cards with it. Complain to your roommate that the lobster is making up his own rules.

96. Make pancakes every morning, but don’t eat them. Draw faces on them, and toss them in the closet. Watch them for several hours each day. Complain to your roommate that your "pancake farm" isn’t evolving into a self-sufficient community. Confide in your roommate that you think the king of the pancakes has been taking bribes.

97. While you are ironing, pretend to burn yourself. Start a garbage can fire in the middle of the room. Toss the iron inside. If your roommate objects, explain that you are just trying to get even.

98. Buy some turtles. Paint numbers on their backs. Race them down the hall.

99. Create an army of animal crackers. Put them through basic training. Set up little checkpoints around the room. Tell your roommate that the camel spotted him/her in a restricted area and said not to do it again. Ask your roommate to apologize to the camel.

100. Put out a plate of cookies at night. Tell your roommate that they’re for the Sandman. Take a bite out of one of the cookies while your roommate is asleep. The next morning, accuse your roommate of having bitten one of the cookies. If he/she tries to tell you the Sandman did it, insist that you know what the Sandman’s teeth marks look like and that those are, in fact, not the Sandman’s teeth marks. Grumble angrily and storm out of the room.