Vivid Analogies

I've been given two really vivid analogies this week that I just thought warranted a public record. Mostly because they were so illustrious of what they were trying to say and two because they made me smile at the almost-inappropriateness of them both.

The first was describing the desperate situation of a budget. The situation involved a person who was so over budget, she was being forced to take PTO (that's paid time off for those of you who don't have a job - which no longer includes me!) - her PTO. The time that she could be saving for Thanksgiving, Christmas or her wedding anniversary. The thing that bugged her even more was the fact that there was money available, just sitting there. And she couldn't get to it because she wasn't allowed to touch it.

we have all that money sitting there
waiting to be used
the work to use it
and I can't touch it
I imagine this is how horny men must feel at a strip club

The second was given at work. Describing another co-worker as someone who can't turn anyone down for fear of disappointing them. Because he is basically the nicest guy ever.

You can imagine the situation he'd be in if he were a high school cheerleader. Yes, you get what I'm saying.