When I graduated from college, no one made me a cake. But if they had, it probably should have looked something like this.
Hahaha!
***EDIT***
Oh my goodness. As my sister just pointed out to me... I DID get a cake for my graduation. How could I have forgotten the put together celebration at last year's Wesley Woods?
I DID get a cake. My mom did a lot of work to make it happen, and to make it a complete surprise. And she didn't even make fun of how long it took me to get through school.
Thanks, Amy, for reminding me.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Seven Years but you finally...
Monday, September 26, 2011
Baby Poop
I was hoping to be writing about a new recipe I just discovered and how awesome and easy it was to make and how delicious it tasted and how I was going to go broke buying avocados in order to eat it....
Unfortunately, I spent the better part of my evening shopping and creating a not so "healthy" dinner, that I literally had to suffer through eating. I guess that's one way to control your portion sizes!
Since it is officially soup season (YAY!) I decided to look up a few new recipes to try. I had an avocado that was on the verge of expiration, and so when I saw "AVOCADO SOUP" I thought that it accomplished both my goals. Little did I realize what I was getting myself in to.
It started out OK. You can't go wrong with sauteed onion, garlic and corn on the cob. It smells delicious and I knew I was in for a treat. But then I opened the box of vegetable stock, and I got a little worried. As I should have been. Once I had followed the direction to blend the simmered soup in the blender, I realized that I had made a terrible mistake.
Ok. So, yes. I deviated from the recipe slightly. I added some collard greens, and just a few pieces of celery (I'm was trying to get rid of the celery I bought -- don't worry, it is in the trash now, and can no longer harm me!). I figured that once it was all blended up, I wouldn't even notice they were in there. And it's supposed to be healthy for you!
The baby poop/food that I had created didn't smell bad, but it certainly did not look appetizing. I didn't know what to do with it. I tasted it. I tried to convince myself that it wasn't as bad as I thought. And then I thought that if I had to eat more than a taste -- if I attempted to eat even a full spoonful -- I would probably throw up. Not to mention, the instructions say that it is meant to be served chilled. So I took to pouring out some portions for Melissa and me, and ended up splattering it everywhere. It seriously looked like a baby had had a huge blowout all over my kitchen! This stuff is a disaster!
But I had spent all that time, money and effort to making this a healthy meal! What to do? Luckily, we have a neighbor who has attended/is currently attending culinary school. I decided to turn over the concoction to him. With just a dash -- Ok, a cup -- of salt, and a bunch of lemon juice, add just a bit of sour cream.... The baby poop was palatable.
I think I made it about halfway through my 1-cup serving.
I guess that is one recipe I will not be recommending. I do, however, recommend you make some contacts with a culinary artist/student. They come in pretty handy.
Unfortunately, I spent the better part of my evening shopping and creating a not so "healthy" dinner, that I literally had to suffer through eating. I guess that's one way to control your portion sizes!
Since it is officially soup season (YAY!) I decided to look up a few new recipes to try. I had an avocado that was on the verge of expiration, and so when I saw "AVOCADO SOUP" I thought that it accomplished both my goals. Little did I realize what I was getting myself in to.
It started out OK. You can't go wrong with sauteed onion, garlic and corn on the cob. It smells delicious and I knew I was in for a treat. But then I opened the box of vegetable stock, and I got a little worried. As I should have been. Once I had followed the direction to blend the simmered soup in the blender, I realized that I had made a terrible mistake.
Ok. So, yes. I deviated from the recipe slightly. I added some collard greens, and just a few pieces of celery (I'm was trying to get rid of the celery I bought -- don't worry, it is in the trash now, and can no longer harm me!). I figured that once it was all blended up, I wouldn't even notice they were in there. And it's supposed to be healthy for you!
The baby poop/food that I had created didn't smell bad, but it certainly did not look appetizing. I didn't know what to do with it. I tasted it. I tried to convince myself that it wasn't as bad as I thought. And then I thought that if I had to eat more than a taste -- if I attempted to eat even a full spoonful -- I would probably throw up. Not to mention, the instructions say that it is meant to be served chilled. So I took to pouring out some portions for Melissa and me, and ended up splattering it everywhere. It seriously looked like a baby had had a huge blowout all over my kitchen! This stuff is a disaster!
But I had spent all that time, money and effort to making this a healthy meal! What to do? Luckily, we have a neighbor who has attended/is currently attending culinary school. I decided to turn over the concoction to him. With just a dash -- Ok, a cup -- of salt, and a bunch of lemon juice, add just a bit of sour cream.... The baby poop was palatable.
I think I made it about halfway through my 1-cup serving.
I guess that is one recipe I will not be recommending. I do, however, recommend you make some contacts with a culinary artist/student. They come in pretty handy.
Story theme:
cooking/baking,
domestic goddess,
eating
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Men in Wheelchairs Need Not Apply
Sorry. I know it's shallow.
But not having two functioning legs is kind of a deal breaker for me.
And YOU (yes, you three guys all in wheelchairs trying to hit on me) can't make me feel bad about not being interested.
But not having two functioning legs is kind of a deal breaker for me.
And YOU (yes, you three guys all in wheelchairs trying to hit on me) can't make me feel bad about not being interested.
Story theme:
dating,
men,
really?,
singlehood
Friday, September 23, 2011
Have you voted???
Do you see this design? The one I worked on for a few hours and was terribly proud? Well, this image is for a contest and it's not doing so well. And it's up against poor resolution, botched photoshop jobs that just happen to be on cooler objects than a button. (And then there are some good designs, that are actual competition.)
Yeah, I put this on a button, and people aren't voting for it. Dang it!
*I'm trying not to be petty and let it bother me too much that while the others' text is written out on some of the others, my "Emma Delagardie Grand Inquisitor for Poetic Excellence" was not mentioned. Nor was the fact that the loose file could be used on ANY image. It doesn't have to be just a button. Since this was mentioned for a few of the other files, I feel a little gypped and sabotaged. But that's why I have such wonderful friends who will get on here and vote ---- riiiiiight??!
So, if you haven't logged on to Lauren Willig's website, and voted for #17 as your favorite, DO IT! Please. And thank you. And then tell all your friends. Use all your email accounts. Etc. Etc.Voting ends on Monday, so don't put it off.
Click here: http://www.laurenwillig.com/news/2011/09/22/2911/#comments
and leave a comment with #17 as your #1.
Thank you for those that have already voted -- some of you are fast. Thank you!!!
Yeah, I put this on a button, and people aren't voting for it. Dang it!
*I'm trying not to be petty and let it bother me too much that while the others' text is written out on some of the others, my "Emma Delagardie Grand Inquisitor for Poetic Excellence" was not mentioned. Nor was the fact that the loose file could be used on ANY image. It doesn't have to be just a button. Since this was mentioned for a few of the other files, I feel a little gypped and sabotaged. But that's why I have such wonderful friends who will get on here and vote ---- riiiiiight??!
So, if you haven't logged on to Lauren Willig's website, and voted for #17 as your favorite, DO IT! Please. And thank you. And then tell all your friends. Use all your email accounts. Etc. Etc.Voting ends on Monday, so don't put it off.
Click here: http://www.laurenwillig.com/news/2011/09/22/2911/#comments
and leave a comment with #17 as your #1.
Thank you for those that have already voted -- some of you are fast. Thank you!!!
Ants on a Log
I remember snack time in pre-school. Once I got in trouble for slurping my soup. Once we ate green eggs and ham. I remember eating mostly everything they put in front of me... until this.
Ants on a log.
It's supposed to be more appetizing to kids when you give healthy food a fun name. I took a bite, and I wanted to spit it back out immediately. So while all the other kids devoured their logs and picked off their ants, I ate the ants, licked out the peanut butter and left the celery behind.
I hate celery. I don't like it in anything. It ruins the tastes of salads. It is gross in soups. The only celery I don't really mind, is celery salt. And I'm pretty sure that doesn't count. However, I used to feel the same way about lasagna and avocados. And since I love both of those things now, I every once and a while feel like I need to give celery another chance.
And I always want to spit it out.
It's a good thing celery is cheap. Because I bought a thing of it last night, thinking I needed something green for the day. I washed it carefully, making sure I did not have any traces of dirt. I smelled it (and turned up my nose) and then I decided to try the old ants on a log, and I grabbed the peanut butter.
It took everything in me to not just lick out the peanut butter. I finished almost a whole one of these --->
but I couldn't do it. I just don't like it!
Sorry celery. You nasty.
P.S:
HAHAHA... oh my goodness. You won't believe what I just discovered about celery. I stole the picture from the website and decided to read it after I finished typing this up. It doesn't change how I feel about the vegetable, though.
Ants on a log.
It's supposed to be more appetizing to kids when you give healthy food a fun name. I took a bite, and I wanted to spit it back out immediately. So while all the other kids devoured their logs and picked off their ants, I ate the ants, licked out the peanut butter and left the celery behind.
I hate celery. I don't like it in anything. It ruins the tastes of salads. It is gross in soups. The only celery I don't really mind, is celery salt. And I'm pretty sure that doesn't count. However, I used to feel the same way about lasagna and avocados. And since I love both of those things now, I every once and a while feel like I need to give celery another chance.
And I always want to spit it out.
It's a good thing celery is cheap. Because I bought a thing of it last night, thinking I needed something green for the day. I washed it carefully, making sure I did not have any traces of dirt. I smelled it (and turned up my nose) and then I decided to try the old ants on a log, and I grabbed the peanut butter.
It took everything in me to not just lick out the peanut butter. I finished almost a whole one of these --->
but I couldn't do it. I just don't like it!
Sorry celery. You nasty.
P.S:
HAHAHA... oh my goodness. You won't believe what I just discovered about celery. I stole the picture from the website and decided to read it after I finished typing this up. It doesn't change how I feel about the vegetable, though.
I hope you had a wonderful weekend!
It is no secret that one of my favorite foods that I often tout is our humble, common friend: Celery. When people tell me they thought it was “just full of water,” it gives me the perfect lead-in to say, “No, no, no!” Celery is high in potassium, a necessary electrolyte which helps with cellular cleansing and fluid levels, and since it is a natural diuretic, helps keep blood pressure normal. It also has Vitamin C. Ha! But you’ve heard about me talk about all that stuff before! You want to know about the Viagra mention!!
Well in my quest to reduce the alarming amount of medications and drugs that proliferate across the Western world, I thought I would take a little stab at the increasingly popular Viagra. It is still a drug, it still has lots of side affects and dangers (possibly affecting vision, causing heart attacks, etc.) and it still compromises our liver- as all medications do.
According to an exhaustive study of purported aphrodisiac foods, celery is the “sexiest” substance on Earth. It has a combination of Vitamin E, magnesium, niacin, potassium and zinc, which are all required for optimum sex. Celery also contains arginine, which is an amino acid that expands blood vessels the way Viagra is supposed to do. And while we are on this topic, I might point out that arginine also increases blood flow to the um, female genitalia when ladies consume celery, making the female genitalia more responsive. Viagra ‘aint doing that!!
Lastly, celery has an aroma which contains the two steroids called androsterone and adrostenol. Research has shown that when we ingest celery, the subtle odor of these two natural chemicals travels through our bodies and works to attract the opposite sex. Single? Trying to get a date? You might just want to eat a few celery stalks before you head out on the town. And my friends that have been consuming my celery-containing Glowing Green Smoothie- you might just want to offer some to your spouse, girl/boy friend, and see what that does for them!
Of course, celery does relax the muscles that regulate blood pressure, and improves blood flow. This also helps with our beauty needs, like helping to reduce undereye circles which indicate stagnant blood and adrenal exhaustion.So yes, Viagra is just one more unnecessary drug that we probably can do without in many cases, especially when we have celery!!
Have a great start to your week.
xx Kimberly
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Drawing for The Garden Intrigue
Emma, Grand Inquisitor for Poetic Excellence from The Garden Intrigue |
The contest was to create something that could be sold in the Pink Store. Initially, I wanted to recruit a guy in our ward who is an illustrator. I had this idea in mind, that would have gone perfect with the types of illustrations he draws, but the more I thought about it, the more I wanted to try my hand.
I've always been jealous of my cousin Camille's creative ability. She paints. She photographs. She's just always been better at crafts and artistic expression. I remember being a little girl and her telling me it was just because she had more experience. The truth is, she has more experience, more training and more talent. But every once and a while, I am a little bit pleased with what gets churned out when I try to be creative.
I'm not saying that the above sketch is a work of art, because it isn't. And if I had photoshop, I know it would look BETTER, but I have to work with what I have, and that leaves a lot of things to be desired sometimes. So aside from the fact that you can't really read the writing, and there are a lot of scan marks that I couldn't get out, I am pretty pleased with Emma from The Garden Intrigue, the Grand Inquisitor for Poetic Excellence. I can't wait to read what she does with Augustus.
When I emailed it to Lauren, she sent me a quick reply back.
I love it! That's gorgeous-- and so very, very Emma!
All best,LaurenSo there you go! Some validation from the author, herself!
Saturday, September 17, 2011
The Ancient Maiden's Lament
I have a mouth for kisses / No one to give or to take / I have a heart in my bosom / Beating for nobody's sake.
-- The Literature of Kissing as printed in A Compendium of Kisses: Facts, Quotes and Curiosities by Lana Citron, p. 72
Friday, September 16, 2011
Kissed Often
You should be kissed and often; and by someone who knows how.Rhett Butler - Gone With the Wind (movie)
Monday, September 12, 2011
Sick of being sad?
Tonight's FHE was a fireside-type thing. Our old high councilman's wife spoke a little about her conversion story, and a lot about her childhood. She lost her mother to an illness at the age of 11, and by the age of 12 her alcoholic father committed suicide. She grew then moved in with a family that introduced her to the church, but seemed to not provide any actual love for her or her sister.
Through all of this, she is one of the happiest people I've ever encountered, and she said that it was because she decided one day, "I'm sick of being sad."
And that was it.
After that, no matter what life has thrown her way, she has sought to be as happy as she can be. And it's an important lesson that I think we need to remember. We can't choose some of the garbage we have to put up with. If we hate our lives... If we are living on zero sleep because of work, school and family drama... Whatever life throws our way, we have to remember that it is part of life and we have to continue to work our ways through it.
But we do not have to be sad.
Being sad is a choice. Granted, there are bouts of sadness. You are entitled to grief and mourning and loss for whatever reason. But you do not have to go day to day being sad, depressed and unhappy.
So if you are living your life sad, depressed and unhappy -- CHEER UP! Count your blessings. Find something that you enjoy. And know, that life is life. And some of us aren't blessed with abounding love and full bank accounts. We have to make do with what we have, and we have to remember that the Savior is there and the Atonement is real and covers all of those feelings.
Through all of this, she is one of the happiest people I've ever encountered, and she said that it was because she decided one day, "I'm sick of being sad."
And that was it.
After that, no matter what life has thrown her way, she has sought to be as happy as she can be. And it's an important lesson that I think we need to remember. We can't choose some of the garbage we have to put up with. If we hate our lives... If we are living on zero sleep because of work, school and family drama... Whatever life throws our way, we have to remember that it is part of life and we have to continue to work our ways through it.
But we do not have to be sad.
Being sad is a choice. Granted, there are bouts of sadness. You are entitled to grief and mourning and loss for whatever reason. But you do not have to go day to day being sad, depressed and unhappy.
So if you are living your life sad, depressed and unhappy -- CHEER UP! Count your blessings. Find something that you enjoy. And know, that life is life. And some of us aren't blessed with abounding love and full bank accounts. We have to make do with what we have, and we have to remember that the Savior is there and the Atonement is real and covers all of those feelings.
Butterbeer Cupcakes
Butterbeer Cupcakes |
Fortunately for me, she was excited to try them. And happened to have all the ingredients necessary! So today, she came over to my house and made me cupcakes.
As promised, these cupcakes are divine! They are seriously the best cupcakes I have ever tried. And it might have a lot to do with the fact that they are butterscotch flavoured....which I absolutely love. Luckily, Megan took her share away and I shared half of mine with some guys in the ward -- because I know I was tempted to eat them all.
I do not think that it is over the top to think that I will be dreaming of these things tonight!!
Yields 18 cupcakes
Butterbeer Cupcakes
2 cups flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
Pinch of salt
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
1 cup dark brown sugar, packed
3 large eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 teaspoon butter flavoring
1/2 cup buttermilk
1/2 cup cream soda
2 cups flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
Pinch of salt
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
1 cup dark brown sugar, packed
3 large eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 teaspoon butter flavoring
1/2 cup buttermilk
1/2 cup cream soda
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Line a cupcake tin with baking cups.
In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Set aside.
In a large mixing bowl, beat together the butter and brown sugar until light and fluffy. Add the eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition. Beat in the vanilla extract and butter flavoring.
Fold in 1/3 of the flour mixture, then the buttermilk, 1/3 of the flour mixture, cream soda, and then the remaining flour. Folding in these ingredients will prevent over-mixing and will result in a fluffier, less dense cupcake. Fill cupcake liners 3/4 of the way full and bake for 15-18 minutes, or until the cupcakes are golden and spring back when touched. Cool completely before frosting.
Butterscotch Ganache
11 ounces (1 package) butterscotch chips
1 cup heavy cream
11 ounces (1 package) butterscotch chips
1 cup heavy cream
In a small saucepan on medium heat, melt the butterscotch chips into the heavy cream, stirring until smooth. Remove from heat and cool to room temperature before using.
Butterscotch Buttercream
6 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
1/4 cup butterscotch ganache (recipe above)
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 teaspoon butter flavoring
Pinch of salt
3-3 1/2 cups powdered sugar
Splash of heavy cream (as needed)
6 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
1/4 cup butterscotch ganache (recipe above)
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 teaspoon butter flavoring
Pinch of salt
3-3 1/2 cups powdered sugar
Splash of heavy cream (as needed)
In a large mixing bowl, beat the butter until light and fluffy. Mix in the butterscotch ganache, vanilla, butter flavoring, and salt. Beat in the powdered sugar for 2-3 minutes, starting with 3 cups and adding more only if necessary. Add the cream a tablespoon at a time until desired consistency is achieved (I only needed 1 tablespoon).
To Assemble
Pour butterscotch ganache into a plastic squeeze bottle. Stab the tip of the bottle into cupcake and fill each cupcake with butterscotch ganache until it starts to overflow.
Pour butterscotch ganache into a plastic squeeze bottle. Stab the tip of the bottle into cupcake and fill each cupcake with butterscotch ganache until it starts to overflow.
Fill a pastry bag with butterscotch buttercream and pipe onto the top of each cupcake. Drizzle on the butterscotch ganache. Lick your fingers clean if you just so happen to get extra butterscotch on them. If you have any leftover butterscotch ganache, it can be used as ice cream topping.
Store in an airtight container at room temperature (that is, if they don't get devoured immediately).
Story theme:
cooking/baking,
eating,
recipe,
THANK YOU
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Patriot Day
I can't let the 10-year anniversary of the terrorist attacks made on September 11, 2001 pass without commenting. Today is Patriot Day. Most the time I don't know what being Patriot really means. I think of those that were patriots during the Revolutionary War and I think of those who lay down their lives as they are off in foreign countries, and here too, defending our freedoms and the ideals of which our country was founded.
And then I think of what I do.
I know it's not enough.
But I do love this country. I'm proud to be an American, even if we are generally thought of as obnoxious, uncultured and a little bit obtuse.
Ten years ago, I walked into my World History class where I sat next to one of my best friends, Kate.
"They blew up the Pentagon!" She said, as I walked up to her.
No. They -- whoever "they" were -- couldn't have. Who would dare to attack us? Within minutes, the TV in our classroom was turned on, and we watched in confusion as the second plane hit. I remember seeing this image over and over again and again.
It's weird to think that this is something that will be in the history books. My children will learn about this the same way I learned about JFK's assassination. And will have a similar attitude to the events that I did, somewhat aloof and detached. But I think it's true, I'll never forget walking in to that World Studies classroom with Kate telling me that someone blew up the Pentagon, and then watching as the second World Trade Tower was hit.
I remember worrying about my uncles, both who work for airlines, one who is a pilot, on the east coast. I remember seeing the footage over and over again and not fully comprehending everything that was going on.
I can't imagine what it must have been like to be there in the chaos and confusion. I just finished reading a book that took place during WWII. The author describes the starving, war-torn areas that I have no real way to grasp the reality of some of the situations. I found myself wondering how people ever survived in the insanity of war, as if it were a distant and long-past thing. And then I watched the 9/11 anniversary special with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and Tom Brokaw, and there were accounts of those that survived the attacks on the World Trade Center and I started to realize, how very real destruction and horror can be in only a matter of minutes.
It's been a decade, and their are survivors who are still suffering from cancer and respiratory problems. There are children who are now adults, who have grown up without parents.
We showed that we can rally together as a country. And heroes rose from the ashes.
And then I think of what I do.
I know it's not enough.
But I do love this country. I'm proud to be an American, even if we are generally thought of as obnoxious, uncultured and a little bit obtuse.
Ten years ago, I walked into my World History class where I sat next to one of my best friends, Kate.
"They blew up the Pentagon!" She said, as I walked up to her.
No. They -- whoever "they" were -- couldn't have. Who would dare to attack us? Within minutes, the TV in our classroom was turned on, and we watched in confusion as the second plane hit. I remember seeing this image over and over again and again.
It's weird to think that this is something that will be in the history books. My children will learn about this the same way I learned about JFK's assassination. And will have a similar attitude to the events that I did, somewhat aloof and detached. But I think it's true, I'll never forget walking in to that World Studies classroom with Kate telling me that someone blew up the Pentagon, and then watching as the second World Trade Tower was hit.
I remember worrying about my uncles, both who work for airlines, one who is a pilot, on the east coast. I remember seeing the footage over and over again and not fully comprehending everything that was going on.
I can't imagine what it must have been like to be there in the chaos and confusion. I just finished reading a book that took place during WWII. The author describes the starving, war-torn areas that I have no real way to grasp the reality of some of the situations. I found myself wondering how people ever survived in the insanity of war, as if it were a distant and long-past thing. And then I watched the 9/11 anniversary special with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and Tom Brokaw, and there were accounts of those that survived the attacks on the World Trade Center and I started to realize, how very real destruction and horror can be in only a matter of minutes.
It's been a decade, and their are survivors who are still suffering from cancer and respiratory problems. There are children who are now adults, who have grown up without parents.
We showed that we can rally together as a country. And heroes rose from the ashes.
Terrorist attacks can shake the foundations of our biggest buildings, but they cannot touch the foundation of America. These acts shatter steel, but they cannot dent the steel of American resolve. America was targeted for attack because we are the brightest beacon for freedom and opportunity in the world. And no one will keep that light from shining.God bless those that are still suffering from this tragic attack. And God bless the men and women who stand up to defend freedom; who choose to run into burning buildings and in the line of fire in order to protect their fellow Americans. And God bless us as a nation, to remember always the day where we came together and remembered why we are proud to be Americans.
President George W. Bush
September 11, 2001
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Jack Weyland Lied to Me!!
Last night I went to dinner with my good friend Becca Riddle. She and I were talking about the expectations we had when we moved to Provo. Jack Weyland is a popular LDS author that writes stories that are so crazy, and yet, seem so realistic and almost always end up with the guy and girl getting together -- usually after lots of really fun, cool dates.
When we moved here, we thought we were going to be the heroines of our own Jack Weyland novel.
Of course, Jack Weyland doesn't seem to know that the majority of people in LDS culture are dating-retards. Taught from a young age that pairing off is inappropriate, avoiding a serious commitment prior to a mission is strongly objected to and all various sorts of physical affection is kept under tight ropes, when the missions are over and the green light says "GO! MARRIAGE! NOW!" It's no wonder that those who aren't rushed to the altar at the age of 21, are left scratching their heads and hanging out at your 37516853rd dessert party.
Then there are those that recognize that you are in fact, a 10 Cow Woman (Thank you, Johnny Lingo), in a bad economy. What's a 10 Cow Woman to do when no one has the cows to pay up??
Thank you, Becca, for a hilarious evening.
When we moved here, we thought we were going to be the heroines of our own Jack Weyland novel.
Of course, Jack Weyland doesn't seem to know that the majority of people in LDS culture are dating-retards. Taught from a young age that pairing off is inappropriate, avoiding a serious commitment prior to a mission is strongly objected to and all various sorts of physical affection is kept under tight ropes, when the missions are over and the green light says "GO! MARRIAGE! NOW!" It's no wonder that those who aren't rushed to the altar at the age of 21, are left scratching their heads and hanging out at your 37516853rd dessert party.
Then there are those that recognize that you are in fact, a 10 Cow Woman (Thank you, Johnny Lingo), in a bad economy. What's a 10 Cow Woman to do when no one has the cows to pay up??
Thank you, Becca, for a hilarious evening.
Story theme:
friends,
musings,
singlehood
Friday, September 09, 2011
J Dawgs
Photo Copyright - J Dawgs website |
I was never one of those students.
I didn't have a typical BYU Freshman year experience in the dorms and dining plus. I heard of J Dawgs, but I think it took me a good two years before I knew where the stand actually was. And once I knew, I still didn't go.
After seven years of living in Provo, I can finally say that I've had a J Dawg. They catered our ward opening social last night.
Their buns are good. Their dawgs are good. And the sauce is good.
I guess I can see why people like them.
I wasn't particularly blown away, or anything.
But then I checked out their website... .their website is sweet.
Thursday, September 08, 2011
Recapture Lake
Today I got paid to drive.
It was a perfect driving day, too. The weather was perfect so that I was not lamenting the fact that I didn't have an air conditioner (except for once) and the sun was shining.
My quest was to get the proposals that we have been working tirelessly on for the last several days down to the San Juan School District in Blanding, Utah.
I was most concerned about my car making it.... Louise has been a bit touchy lately, and it would have been a real shame to be in the middle of the desert with no cell service and to have the engine blow (which has happened) or the brakes to go out (which has happened) or... any number of things. But she was a champ! And I had no problems whatsoever.
I had to be there before the office closed, so I put the pedal to the metal and drove as safely as I could, making a single stop where I purchased a book on CD. Since there is no radio in the middle of nowhere, and I only had a single CD in my car, this was a MUST -- even if it was terrible.
When I hit Monticello, about 20 minutes from where I needed to be, I started panicking because it was about 10 minutes until the supposed closing time. I started planning on what I would do if I needed to get a hotel room and how I would work that out.
I didn't have too much trouble finding the portable trailer that serves as the grounds and buildings office, and the guys in it only gave me a little bit of a hard time. But once the proposals were in the right hands, I headed out looking for adventure. And that really pretty reservoir I saw on my way in.
I stopped at the Blanding museum, which didn't have much to offer. Though, there were a few books that I wanted to buy (but considering that I have purchased too many books in the past two weeks, I have been banned! from buying any more for a while) but practiced self-restraint, thanked the attendant, and headed out.
Recapture Lake/Reservoir was a stunning shade of cerulean blue when I passed it. Unfortunately, that was because the water was tinted by my sunglasses -- it was not actually that color. Fortunately, it was still beautiful. I drove a path that headed to the "recreation area" to see where it would take me, and found myself the sole person on that side of the lake. I parked Louise, and stood outside, relishing the tranquility of the area. Then I drove down to the dock area, and found a peaceful little "beachy" area.
It was so picturesque. And so breathtaking. And I thought, "What a perfect, tranquil place to read my scriptures. If only I had th--..." And then I noticed that my church bag was sitting there, and I did in fact have my scriptures. Providence? Maybe. But probably just laziness, since they've obviously been in my car since Sunday.
So, in order to not make myself a hypocrite to myself (and to God) I pulled them out, and did a little reading. And it was a perfect place to read scriptures. The wind was blowing just a little bit to rustle through the brush and trees. The water gently lapped against the rocks. It was only slightly ruined by the bugs that kept buzzing around.
I enjoyed the area for about an hour, and then decided to hop back on the road so that it wasn't midnight by the time I got back. The sunset was gorgeous. Seriously. And I would know, seeing as how I was driving directly into the flaming orb for a good part of the drive.
Once the sun had set, and it was fully dark, I entered the canyon near Price, and that was where I realized, driving is rather stressful when you know that all the shrubs and fence posts are laying in wait to spring out at you disguised as a deer and you can barely see the faint lines on the road as the bright lights on the opposite side blind the dickens out of you.
But really, Utah is a beautiful state. There are so much diversity in the landforms, vegetation and even climate. I've been to Moab before, and I can't believe how different it is from Bryce Canyon, which is completely the opposite of Cache forest. It's all so breathtaking in different ways. I actually really liked driving down near Blanding, which I have never done before. It even looked different than anywhere else I've been in Utah.
But I will admit, even with how awesome it all looks -- I do wonder what the first settlers really thought when they decided to put in stakes. "Here? Really? Are you sure?" Because, that would have been my reaction.
It was a perfect driving day, too. The weather was perfect so that I was not lamenting the fact that I didn't have an air conditioner (except for once) and the sun was shining.
My quest was to get the proposals that we have been working tirelessly on for the last several days down to the San Juan School District in Blanding, Utah.
I was most concerned about my car making it.... Louise has been a bit touchy lately, and it would have been a real shame to be in the middle of the desert with no cell service and to have the engine blow (which has happened) or the brakes to go out (which has happened) or... any number of things. But she was a champ! And I had no problems whatsoever.
I had to be there before the office closed, so I put the pedal to the metal and drove as safely as I could, making a single stop where I purchased a book on CD. Since there is no radio in the middle of nowhere, and I only had a single CD in my car, this was a MUST -- even if it was terrible.
When I hit Monticello, about 20 minutes from where I needed to be, I started panicking because it was about 10 minutes until the supposed closing time. I started planning on what I would do if I needed to get a hotel room and how I would work that out.
I didn't have too much trouble finding the portable trailer that serves as the grounds and buildings office, and the guys in it only gave me a little bit of a hard time. But once the proposals were in the right hands, I headed out looking for adventure. And that really pretty reservoir I saw on my way in.
I stopped at the Blanding museum, which didn't have much to offer. Though, there were a few books that I wanted to buy (but considering that I have purchased too many books in the past two weeks, I have been banned! from buying any more for a while) but practiced self-restraint, thanked the attendant, and headed out.
Recapture Lake/Reservoir was a stunning shade of cerulean blue when I passed it. Unfortunately, that was because the water was tinted by my sunglasses -- it was not actually that color. Fortunately, it was still beautiful. I drove a path that headed to the "recreation area" to see where it would take me, and found myself the sole person on that side of the lake. I parked Louise, and stood outside, relishing the tranquility of the area. Then I drove down to the dock area, and found a peaceful little "beachy" area.
It was so picturesque. And so breathtaking. And I thought, "What a perfect, tranquil place to read my scriptures. If only I had th--..." And then I noticed that my church bag was sitting there, and I did in fact have my scriptures. Providence? Maybe. But probably just laziness, since they've obviously been in my car since Sunday.
So, in order to not make myself a hypocrite to myself (and to God) I pulled them out, and did a little reading. And it was a perfect place to read scriptures. The wind was blowing just a little bit to rustle through the brush and trees. The water gently lapped against the rocks. It was only slightly ruined by the bugs that kept buzzing around.
I enjoyed the area for about an hour, and then decided to hop back on the road so that it wasn't midnight by the time I got back. The sunset was gorgeous. Seriously. And I would know, seeing as how I was driving directly into the flaming orb for a good part of the drive.
Once the sun had set, and it was fully dark, I entered the canyon near Price, and that was where I realized, driving is rather stressful when you know that all the shrubs and fence posts are laying in wait to spring out at you disguised as a deer and you can barely see the faint lines on the road as the bright lights on the opposite side blind the dickens out of you.
But really, Utah is a beautiful state. There are so much diversity in the landforms, vegetation and even climate. I've been to Moab before, and I can't believe how different it is from Bryce Canyon, which is completely the opposite of Cache forest. It's all so breathtaking in different ways. I actually really liked driving down near Blanding, which I have never done before. It even looked different than anywhere else I've been in Utah.
But I will admit, even with how awesome it all looks -- I do wonder what the first settlers really thought when they decided to put in stakes. "Here? Really? Are you sure?" Because, that would have been my reaction.
Saturday, September 03, 2011
Pizza Pirates
Last night I worked late, and so I decided to order a pizza that would hopefully arrive around the same time I did. I knew on Friday night, it might be too much to hope, so I happily waited for the estimated 45 minutes to pass, and then started getting annoyed. So I called, and while I was on the phone, I received a text. I waited to hang up with Papa Johns, who brushed me off, rather rudely, "Oh yes, it will be there soon. Ok? Bye."
I checked my message to find the following from an unknown number:
I was upset that I had to wait for over an hour for my pizza. I was upset that they didn't replace the pizza sauce to my breadsticks with another garlic sauce, as I had requested. I was curious as to why they didn't have me sign a slip, like they usually do when you put the pizza on a card. And I was ticked that I had added my tip on before the delivery girl even got there.
I felt bad to the pizza pirates, who texted and said that when they finally received their order, it was cold.
What concerns me most is that I have a pending transaction on my bank account for TWO orders. And when I called to get that cleared up, the manager was sort of an idiot. I don't know if he was listening, but he was like, "Did you get your pizza and your breadsticks?"
Yes. But that isn't the issue. I just don't want to be charged twice!
So, hopefully, only one transaction will go through, and not both of them. And you can bet that I'm probably done with the Provo Papa Johns.
I checked my message to find the following from an unknown number:
Shelli...you are eating our pizza...yours is sketchy..Hawaiian with green peppers...It only took me a second to realize that whoever this person was, thought I was enjoying their pizza whilst they were being forced to enjoy mine (it was BBQ chicken with green peppers). So I replied.
Sounds delicious...Only I haven't gotten mine! You pizza pirate! How did you end up with mine?
Yes we did. Weird choice in toppings. :)
Delicious though. I try to have something green in all my meals...even pizza. And I'm starting, so I'm kind of upset that my pizza is where ever you are...and not here!We texted back and forth until both of us had our pizzas. Mine had been remade and finally delivered. The delivery girl refused to take any sort of responsibility for having delivered my original pizza to the wrong place, even though I told her that the people she delivered to had texted me and told me what happened.
I was upset that I had to wait for over an hour for my pizza. I was upset that they didn't replace the pizza sauce to my breadsticks with another garlic sauce, as I had requested. I was curious as to why they didn't have me sign a slip, like they usually do when you put the pizza on a card. And I was ticked that I had added my tip on before the delivery girl even got there.
I felt bad to the pizza pirates, who texted and said that when they finally received their order, it was cold.
What concerns me most is that I have a pending transaction on my bank account for TWO orders. And when I called to get that cleared up, the manager was sort of an idiot. I don't know if he was listening, but he was like, "Did you get your pizza and your breadsticks?"
Yes. But that isn't the issue. I just don't want to be charged twice!
So, hopefully, only one transaction will go through, and not both of them. And you can bet that I'm probably done with the Provo Papa Johns.
Friday, September 02, 2011
HELP! Asking for Advice on: Hair
This week's poll brought to you by my impatience and restlessness with my hair. I've put the poll on the left hand side of my blog, please take a minute and let me know what you think I should do.
I've been growing out my hair for a long while now, and it's gotten to the point where I am sick of it. It isn't full and pretty like I imagined it to be. It take forever to dry. If I try to curl it, it goes flat. If I straighten it, it goes frizzy.
I miss the ease of shorter hair, and so I think I'm ready to head back to a haircut similar to what I had in April of last year. (The last time I really cut my hair.)
Ok, ok. I admit, that sometimes it looks cute when it's long. But that is why I'm putting it out there for everyone else to make this all-important decision for me. Now that summer is over, and pony tails have lost their appeal... I need a change.
I've been growing out my hair for a long while now, and it's gotten to the point where I am sick of it. It isn't full and pretty like I imagined it to be. It take forever to dry. If I try to curl it, it goes flat. If I straighten it, it goes frizzy.
I miss the ease of shorter hair, and so I think I'm ready to head back to a haircut similar to what I had in April of last year. (The last time I really cut my hair.)
Ok, ok. I admit, that sometimes it looks cute when it's long. But that is why I'm putting it out there for everyone else to make this all-important decision for me. Now that summer is over, and pony tails have lost their appeal... I need a change.
Just a reminder of what it looks like short. |
Thursday, September 01, 2011
Island in the Sun
Tonight I went up to Salt Lake to have a final dinner with my cousin Chloe, as she heads to Florida this weekend to begin a new adventure. I grabbed our friend Jared and we met at La Hacienda, a favorite Mexican restaurant in the area. Unfortunately for us, it was closed. Fortunately, though, Jared loomed outside long enough to talk to the owner who took pity on us and sent us to a closer La Hacienda in Draper, promising to call ahead and tell the manager that we were to get 50% off our meal.
The food was delicious -- as it always is -- and on our way back, watching the final glimpses of daylight disappear from the western horizon, my hair whipping across my face, Island in the Sun by Weezer started to play on the radio.
We were in a Jeep, and the top was off and the doors removed. It was hot, but not sweltering. The open road, open sky and the moon was available to be seen all around us. I wish I had the eloquence to describe the touch of teals and golds, and the perfectly shaped crescent moon, which looked larger than normal.
I was with people I care about, enjoying the weather, enjoying the view and loving the experience.
It was a pretty perfect moment.
And I really just love that song.
The food was delicious -- as it always is -- and on our way back, watching the final glimpses of daylight disappear from the western horizon, my hair whipping across my face, Island in the Sun by Weezer started to play on the radio.
We were in a Jeep, and the top was off and the doors removed. It was hot, but not sweltering. The open road, open sky and the moon was available to be seen all around us. I wish I had the eloquence to describe the touch of teals and golds, and the perfectly shaped crescent moon, which looked larger than normal.
I was with people I care about, enjoying the weather, enjoying the view and loving the experience.
It was a pretty perfect moment.
And I really just love that song.
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