Monday, September 26, 2011

Baby Poop

I was hoping to be writing about a new recipe I just discovered and how awesome and easy it was to make and how delicious it tasted and how I was going to go broke buying avocados in order to eat it....

Unfortunately, I spent the better part of my evening shopping and creating a not so "healthy" dinner, that I literally had to suffer through eating. I guess that's one way to control your portion sizes!

Since it is officially soup season (YAY!) I decided to look up a few new recipes to try. I had an avocado that was on the verge of expiration, and so when I saw "AVOCADO SOUP" I thought that it accomplished both my goals. Little did I realize what I was getting myself in to.

It started out OK. You can't go wrong with sauteed onion, garlic and corn on the cob. It smells delicious and I knew I was in for a treat. But then I opened the box of vegetable stock, and I got a little worried. As I should have been. Once I had followed the direction to blend the simmered soup in the blender, I realized that I had made a terrible mistake.

Ok. So, yes. I deviated from the recipe slightly. I added some collard greens, and just a few pieces of celery (I'm was trying to get rid of the celery I bought -- don't worry, it is in the trash now, and can no longer harm me!). I figured that once it was all blended up, I wouldn't even notice they were in there. And it's supposed to be healthy for you!

The baby poop/food that I had created didn't smell bad, but it certainly did not look appetizing. I didn't know what to do with it. I tasted it. I tried to convince myself that it wasn't as bad as I thought. And then I thought that if I had to eat more than a taste -- if I attempted to eat even a full spoonful -- I would probably throw up. Not to mention, the instructions say that it is meant to be served chilled. So I took to pouring out some portions for Melissa and me, and ended up splattering it everywhere. It seriously looked like a baby had had a huge blowout all over my kitchen! This stuff is a disaster!

But I had spent all that time, money and effort to making this a healthy meal! What to do? Luckily, we have a neighbor who has attended/is currently attending culinary school. I decided to turn over the concoction to him. With just a dash -- Ok, a cup -- of salt, and a bunch of lemon juice, add just a bit of sour cream.... The baby poop was palatable.

I think I made it about halfway through my 1-cup serving.

I guess that is one recipe I will not be recommending. I do, however, recommend you make some contacts with a culinary artist/student. They come in pretty handy.

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