Can we just have a small moment of silence for the fact that all the good men are taken?
Take a moment and grieve the fact that the perfect guy - nay, EVERY perfect guy - is taken. The ones that are witty and charming; have perfectly straight, white teeth with brilliant smiles, the ones that flirt like masters whether in person, on the phone or over email. The guys that are personable, friendly and sociable. For the guys that can grow super impressive beards, and rock them. Those guys that dress nice and smell better.
Yeah, those guys. The ones that are untouchable, and because they are, you can totally play it cool and have normal conversations instead of the awkwardness that fills the dialogue of the unknown.
Just take a minute and mourn with me fellow singles, because I know the married ones out there do not understand.
[Insert long, haggard sigh here.]